Helpless
by sqquidkid
Summary: Brittany is being abused, and doesn't know what to do. Santana is there for a helping hand, but will Britt tell her what's going on? Disclaimer: I do not own glee or the characters
1. Chapter 1

It started off as a normal conversation, between Brittany and her dad. She only asked if he would get her a duck. She asked only once and asked only out of curiousness.

"No. What the fuck Brittany you shallow girl?" He screamed at her.

He wasn't a drinker, and he certainly wasn't drunk. He was about to go off to his mates house with Brittany's sister. Brittany didn't know how to react to his sudden anger at her. It seemed to Brittany that her dad only cared for her sister, who was younger than her. Her mum was out at work, and even if her mum was there, she wouldn't prevent anything.

"I only asked." Brittany said voice slightly rising, and crackling.

Her eyes started to fill up a puddle of tears. She looks up at him from the chair she was sitting on, and was surprised to see her dad so close to her, his hand out at the ready to hit Brittany. Through Brittany's eyes, all of it went by slow. He hit her so hard her head flew back onto the wall behind Brittany. Brittany was confused and didn't know what to do. She looked at him like she was beaten and helpless. He goes in for another hit. And again. And again. And again. And one last time. By this time Brittany was all hot and sweaty and her face was full of her tears. She was confused and she didn't know why he was hitting her. Her sister was just stood at the other side of the room staring, with fear ridden eyes. Brittany was so angry, and sad. He was still shouting at her, but Brittany couldn't hear a thing. She was in shock, and she was crying too hard to notice. Just as he goes in for another hit, Brittany yells "GO AWAY." as loud as she could. Everyone in the room was surprised at her sudden scream.

_Why is he yelling at me? I can't do this. Take me someone. Please. I can't do it anymore. I need to go. I need to run, take me anywhere I won't complain. Just get me out of here._

Brittany was tired, as well as angry, and sad, but at the same time she felt strong and powerful. She hit the wall as hard as she could, that her veins on her wrist became more apparent. Her hands went red, and she threw whatever it was that was in her hand. She was crying furiously and she was angry. She wanted to break something, but she couldn't. Her legs were heavy and her body was heavy. Her head drooped and her hands fell. She wanted to let her anger go, but she couldn't because she was tired. Her dad was still staring at her, so was her sister, never wavering from her stance. She looks up at him, fear in her eyes and anger in her mouth. She saw no apologetic stance, no apologetic eyes, and no apologetic anything. All she saw was some man she didn't recognise anymore, the same man that had taken some part into making her, with anger riding his whole body. He turned to leave, without another word, another hit, and another look. He dragged Brittany's sister away, and they went. Just like that. They left a broken Brittany on her chair. As soon as they were out of sight, Brittany didn't have the strength to keep her place on the chair and she fell on the ground. She screamed, not of physical hurt but because she was emotionally (as well as physically) hurt by her dad. She asked herself why one more time. No answer came. She asked if someone or something would just take her. She was still angry, and tired. She fumbled around on the ground looking for her phone. She scrolled down her list, and finally found the number she was looking for, Santana's. She dialled it, hoping she would answer.


	2. Chapter 2

**I'm sorry for the late update, I promise to update much sooner! Thanks for the reviews! Also, I'm sorry, I can't write long chapters.**

RING. RING. RING.

Santana fumbled beside her to find her phone. When she found it, she rejected the call, not even looking to see who was calling her. Santana was still sleeping. She had been drinking all night and she felt extremely tired.

"Fuccckk." Brittany said to herself as she crushed her phone in her hands.

Brittany decided to leave her a message.

"Haeeey Santanaa. Pweassee call me." Brittany sniffled.

Brittany stayed on the ground, for hours and hours. She dared not move scared that her bone would crush her back to the ground. Suddenly there was a muffled noise just outside her front door, it sounded like someone was trying to get in. Brittany scrambled to her feet as fast as she could, scared that it might be her dad, but no matter how hard she tried she kept falling back down. Brittany started to cry again. She was furious and she was scared, and she was alone. She'd thought that Santana would be there for her.

"B? Where are you? I'm sorry I didn't answer your call, I was sleeping. I'm sorry. Are you okay? You sounded really upset on the phone, so I ran up here as fast as I could. B? And sorry, I know I should have knocked, but I used the key you gave me instead." Santana huffed and puffed.

"mnmnmnmmh." Was all Brittany could manage.

Brittany could hear footsteps running towards her, her eyes were shut, her tears acting like glue.

"Oh my god B." Santana's eyes now spilling with tears.

She rushed over and cradled Brittany in her arms. She wiped Brittany's tears away, and Brittany felt better.

"What happened?" Santana asked.

"fhsdj hdsfsg vndskfjyewa." Brittany started to dibble dabble.

"Shhh babe. It's okay I'm here now, Where are your parents? No, never mind, let's go to my house okay babe?" Santana tried to comfort Brittany.

Santana leaned down to give Brittany a kiss, still cradling Britt in her arms.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys, here's a quick fic before I go to London to meet my uncle! Haha, I'm not even dressed yet.**

The journey to Santana's house was difficult, considering that Santana ran up to Brittany's house. Santana basically carried Brittany all the way to her house. Brittany was still crying, and she was still in shock. When they got there, Santana was pleased that her parents weren't in, that way no questions would have to be asked. Santana carried a now sleeping Brittany to her bed and placed her down gently. Santana laid beside her still holding on to her. She gave her a quick peck before she turned the telly on.

A few hours later Brittany started to stir in Santana's bed and Santana quickly turned to face her. Santana was worried. She had been watching a bruise form in Brittany's cheek, and as soon as she noticed it she held Brittany even tighter, to the point that she started to get pins and needles. Brittany peeled her eyes open, and Santana smiled at her friend. Brittany smiled back, wincing at the pain.

"Babe, what happened here?" Santana whispered, while grazing Brittany's cheek lightly.

Brittany started to tear up again, and Santana just held her. Santana was confused and she was ready to kill who, or whatever had made Brittany so fragile. Brittany stopped crying, she figured that she had to, sometime, and now was a good time to.

"I-it was uh my .. dishes up and i didn't, and then she got a rat and hit me with it." Brittany babbled, afraid of what the consequences were, if she had told Santana.

"Babe, tell me the truth. It's okay, Sany is here for you." Santana encouraged.

"...I-it was m-my d-." Brittany started to sniffle, and in great timing the shuffling sound of keys made its way into their ears. "I have to go, I'm sorry for the trouble. I love you." And with that Brittany got to her feet.

"As I love you babe." Santana whispered.

Santana made her way downstairs with Brittany in her arms, and escorted her to her front door, passing her parents.

"Would you like me to take you home babe?" Santana asked

"No, no I'll be fine, I'll call you." Brittany's voice was cracking, and as she stepped outside, her knees started to buckle. She looked around and then turned to face Santana and gave her a quick peck on the lips, and with that she made her way home, alone.

**How about a review? Thanks guise!**


	4. Chapter 4

**I'm sorry, I was going to update in the afternoon, but we got lost in London. So I wrote this chapter and the next in London, so it might be a little iffy. One of you wanted quitt, and quitt you'll have in a few more chapters. I hadn't thought about her being in the story so it might be a little off, or a little random. Thanks for the reviews, and I am trying to make my chapters long. What do you guys want to happen at the end? Give me some ideas, because I am still undecided.**

Brittany made her way home, and as she reached for her front door, she started to think about how she could get to her room without drawing attention to herself. She thought about maybe just trying to be as quiet as she could, but for Brittany that was next to impossible, unless of course she was dancing, but Brittany was in no dancing mood. Or she could just run up the stairs as fast as she could, but that would make too much noise. Then she thought about wearing her invisibility cloak, but she had lost it. So after a few quick minutes she decided it'd be best just to run upstairs and lock her door before anyone would come. She twisted her key and her heart rate started to rise. She stepped inside, and closed the door behind her, with a slam. It wasn't the best thing to do, but it was too late for that. She ran up the stairs panting. She reached her bedroom door and opened it, she stepped inside, turned back around and locked the door behind her. No sigh of relief came to her. She took her shoes off, and lunged at her bed. She reached for her phone, to tell Santana she had got home okay, because Brittany knew how cranky Santana gets when she is not assured of Brittany's safety, though Brittany wasn't very safe at home either, but Santana didn't know that. Brittany also knew she was very lucky that Santana had let her get home by herself. Brittany didn't want to talk so instead she opted for a text, that way Brittany wouldn't have to deal with the question, not yet anyway.

Hey S. Thanks again. I'm sorry. Talk soon. B x

She then threw her phone under her pillow. She hid under her duvet, asking her eyes not to leak anymore salty tears. She closed her eyes tight, and one scene kept replaying behind her lids. She couldn't escape, or run the other away from the things that were happening to her. She had to face it, and she had to face it now. But Brittany being Brittany, she would do anything to escape. If Brittany opened her eyes, she would surely cry, so instead Brittany watched her dad hit her, again and again.

Just outside her door loud stomping footsteps were coming. She didn't panic, she didn't care, and frankly she was too busy preventing herself from crying to hear her angry mother outside. She stormed in through Brittany's door, key in hand. She walked over to Brittany wailing and shouting. Brittany couldn't make out any words. She was still in the process of preventing herself from crying. She stayed very still, afraid that one little movement will cause the tears to come flooding out. Her mum, just like her dad, slapped Brittany across her face, a lot of times. Brittany was on her side, eyes closed, not processing the fact that she was being slapped. Her mother's hard slaps were adding to Brittany's bruise.

"WHAT... WHERE... FUCKK.. SHOUTING? IDIOT..."

Was all Brittany could make out. Brittany wanted her mum to go and leave her alone. She just wanted to be with Santana alone.

Brittany awoke to hardened tears on her cheek, and a massive bruise on both her cheeks, Brittany wondered how her mum got to the other side of her cheek. She couldn't remember much of what happened that night, but all she knew was that she had to get away. She needed time to think and she needed time to evaluate things.

**Poor B! So heres the question again, what do you guys want to happen at the end of the story? What do you want to happen to B's parents? By the way, I'm not sure if I should carry on with this story? Yes/No?**


	5. Chapter 5

**I originally planned this story to be set during summer, well actually I didn't think about school, but one of you wanted glee club to find out, so my days might be a little iffy.**

The next day Santana woke up, and checked her phone to see if Brittany called her, or left anymore messages. Nothing. She reread the text Brittany had previously sent her and started to doubt if the message did or didn't have something more behind it, or if it had a double meaning.

'... Talk soon.'

Soon. Santana wondered why she had used the word soon.

_Ugh, damn shit crap. She better not disappear again. _

Santana dialled Brittany's number.

"Hello?" Brittany's voice was cracking. There were sounds of children shouting and screaming, and an odd sound of something creaking.

"Hey B, its S," Santana thought of asking her where she was but Santana knew exactly where she was. "are you alright babe? Did you go home? Why are you at the park? You do know we have school again right babe? Summers not 'till July."

"Uh, I have to go, just... Just I love you ok?" Brittany said tears in her eyes, her voice never wavering.

Santana knew exactly that Brittany had tears in her eyes. "Babe, I can come pick you up if you want, we can talk and stuff?" Santana offered desperate to find out exactly what was going on. Deep down Santana knew, she knew. She always knew. Her and Brittany were basically the same person. But Santana didn't want to accept it. Santana didn't want to know that Brittany was suffering because of her parents. Santana resented the idea of her Brittany being hurt.

"No honey. I'm sorry. I have to go. Talk soon."

"Soon." Santana repeated to Brittany and to herself. "I love you too. Be careful out there okay, and promise me you won't do anything stupid?"

"For you babe." Brittany hung up. Santana was worried. Brittany wasn't usually like this.

Santana got up and got dressed for school. She wondered whether Brittany was coming to school or not. Nevertheless Santana put on a dress that Brittany loved.

_What was she doing up at 7. In the park. On our swing, the swing we had met in._

**Was that ok? I'm not planning on updating without a review on this chapter. (And again) What should happen at the end? What should happen to Brittany's parents?**


	6. Chapter 6

**Well I wasn't planning on updating so soon, but okay, here goes. By the way thanks for all the ideas, I'm thinking of doing some of the things you suggested. But that will be later on in the story.**

Santana got to school early. She was eager to find Brittany... if she was coming in. Santana couldn't bear to see her best friend so tore and broken. She had her eyes everywhere, searching for the blonde that always put a smile to her face, the blonde that never left her mind. Santana knew Brittany wasn't coming in, because she always knew, but she couldn't help but hope.

Santana looked for Brittany everywhere in the school, even though she knew.

"Hey S, where's Britt Britt?" Quinn asked.

"Oh, hey Q. Um, I'm not sure." Santana lied.

"Oh come on San. Do you think I'm stupid?" Quinn challenged.

Santana smirked. "Well... Is that a trick question?" Quinn rolled her eyes and Santana continued. "Britt's been really weird recently."

"Uh... San, Britt's _always_ weird. That's why we love her." Quinn stated. Santana's eyebrows knitted together.

"No, I mean she's more 'out' of it than usual." Santana hesitated. "... maybe you should talk to her or something? Maybe she'll feel more comfortable talking about _whatever_" Santana stopped, because she knew. "It is that's wrong, with you." Santana dismissed the idea, and she was right to. Brittany loved Santana, and Britt always told Santana everything.

"Sure. Anyway, got to go. Puck and I are _babysitting _again." Quinn smiled.

"Ugh, Q please spare me the details." Santana rolled her eyes.

"Oh... wait how did you kn-"Quinn was cut off.

"It's a gift." Santana winked.

**And a response to one of my anon reviewers, nope, my chapters aren't going to get any longer, sorry. It's just difficult for me, I might make a long one, but it will probably take me ages. I will just try and update sooner, which is an equivalent to a long chapter right? Anyways thanks guys. **


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks for all the reviews guys. Here's chapter 7.**

While Santana was looking for Brittany at school, Brittany was hiding under her duvet. She was hiding from reality, and she was running from the future, when she heard her phone buzz. She froze even more, if that was humanly possible. She hesitated, and everything around her froze. She got up from her bed to find her phone, and she saw she had 9 missed calls from Santana, 4 messages from Santana and 1 message from Quinn. She decided to open Quinn's messages first as she was too scared to read Santana's because she knew that she would spill it all out and her best friend would call the police, and what would happen to her sister? Would she be okay? Surely, she would, right? Her parents loved Brittany's sister.

Hey B, where are you? Come meet up with me sometime, need to discuss birthday plans with San.

The first thing Brittany noticed was 'San.' Was it fair that she was lying to her best friend? She then proceeded on to read Santana's messages.

B, why aren't you at school? Are you alright?

A lump formed in Brittany's throat.

B? I'm worried ok, where are you? I can skip my lessons so we can talk yeah?

She tried to swallow it down.

Brittany, please! Don't do this to me.

But she failed.

Right, that's it. I'm making my way there now.

"Crap!" She looked at the time stamp, the text was sent about 5 minutes ago.

She decided it was best just to have her around, and lie. She knew better than to lie to Santana, but right now, Brittany couldn't tell. She needed a plan first.

A few minutes passed, and Santana just walked in Brittany's house. She thought that if she knocked Brittany wouldn't answer.

"B?" She said, her voice bouncing off the walls. "Britt where are you?"

Brittany took a deep breath. "Here babe." Santana walked up the stairs, slowly wondering what she would do, what she would say to Brittany. Santana reached Brittany's door. Brittany could hear Santana's hands fumbling at the door knob. Santana knew Brittany knew she was there, she took a deep breath, just as she opened the door, and so did Brittany.

Santana and Brittany looked at each other for quite long. Brittany was marvelling at Santana's perfect figure, perfect face and perfect everything. She could see the worry in Santana's eyes. Santana was also marvelling at Brittany's perfectness, she thought that even with her bruises she looked stunning, that even with puffy swollen eyes that she was flawless. Brittany smiled, causing Santana to smile back.

"I missed you." Brittany whispered, looking down at her lap.

"I missed _you_." Santana said taking a seat on Brittany's bed next to her.

Santana faced Brittany, and Brittany faced Santana. "What's been going on with you?" Santana asked softly, even though she knew deep down, and Brittany knew that Santana knew deep down, hence all the panic in her mind. Santana took Brittany's face in her hands. Her touch burning Brittany's face. Brittany would have pulled back if it was anyone else but Santana. She felt safe. Brittany leaned in and kissed Santana on the lips. Santana kissed back, and Brittany deepened their kiss. They did this for a lot, like a lot of minutes. Scared that if they pulled back one second for a breath, they would lose each other in the reality that was about to hit them. Brittany's ear picked up the sound of keys at her front door, she pulled back instantly. Santana looked at her strangely.

"Babe?" Brittany shuffled, took Santana's hand in her own and squeezed it tight.

"You have to go. I'm sorry." Brittany forced a lump down her throat. "I'll c-text you."

Brittany stood up and escorted her friend out. Santana did as she was told and didn't ask a question. Her parents saw Santana's hand in Brittany's and scowered a look at Brittany. Santana didn't notice. Brittany opened her front door and let her friend go, scared that her parents might take it out on Santana. She watched Santana go, and as soon as she was out of sight, she took a deep breath and turned around; fear was now taking control of her body. Her eyes were watering; her throat formed a bigger lump, her knees started to buckle, her arms felt like they were about to fall off, her heart sank so deep that she doubted if anyone would ever find it again. She knew that someone would, Santana would. Every time Brittany looked at her, her heart melts into a pool. She sped-walked up the stairs, hoping that her mum or her dad would not stop her in her tracks. She was afraid.

"Brittany. What the fuck? When did I say that your leazy little Mexican friend could come over? Huh? And why were you holding her hands? Are you some sort of lesbian idiot dyke? Why do you even like that stupid girl?" Her mum was throwing all these words out at Brittany.

"She's not Mexican and she's not stupid. The only stupid bitch in here is you." Brittany spat.

"Excuse me? Come here you dyke." Her mum screamed. Brittany wondered where her sister was, probably at her friend or something.

"How dare you speak like that to your mother?" Her dad blasted. "YOUR MOTHER SAID COME HERE!"

Brittany made her way there, slowly, knees buckling and heart sinking even further.

Brittany woke up the next day, refusing to remember the night before. She woke up under her bed. She was hiding, because when hiding under the duvet didn't work, she needed a safer hiding place. But the only place Brittany felt safe in was Santana's arms. She moved her hand to wipe away the tears that had settled on her cheek. She wiped away the tears, and as she did she realised her cheek was stinging. She placed her finger on the place it hurt, and pulled her hand out in front of her. She saw blood. She shuffled out under her bed, every muscles aching and hurting. She saw her mum out at the door staring at Brittany. Brittany thought she was going to have another go at Brittany, but instead she said or shouted at her.

"Go to school today." And with that she turned away and walked out Brittany's door, walked down the stairs and walk out the front door.

Brittany shook, still on the ground, uncontrollable tears now streaming down her face. It hurt for her to cry, but they wouldn't stop. Brittany got up, and went to her bathroom. She took her clothes off looked at the mirror and saw that she had bruises covering nearly every part of her body. She had a swollen eye, and a bleeding cheek. She had cuts on her legs and tears on her face. She looked away refusing everything she was seeing. She walked to the shower and washed away her tears and her blood.

She looked in her wardrobe wondering what to wear and how best to cover everything up. She picked out some jeans, a long sleeved top, and a beanie. She put it on, controlling her tears. Her body hurt like hell. She was scared about how Santana would react to it. She was scared that if she even just looked at Santana her tears would just come flooding out. Brittany didn't know how she was going to cope.

**Ok, so that was my attempt at a long story. Was it okay? I was planning on continuing but then I thought nah, lolol. Reviews please. This took me ages and I want some reviews. I haven't reread this, so sorry if there are any mistakes, I will reread it when I post it. **


	8. Chapter 8

Brittany made her way down the hallway, head down avoiding any eye contact. She knew rumours had spread around about her where beings, and in high school rumours spread fast. They come out of someone's mouth, and suddenly the whole school knows. Everyone. Even if they don't even know who the rumour is about. Brittany could sense everyone's eyes on her. She hoped that they wouldn't notice her bruises, and her cuts, and the way she winced at every move, and every breath.

"BRITT!" Brittany stopped, tears at the corner of her eyes. She didn't turn around, because if she did, they would see. So, she just stopped. Santana grabbed Brittany's hands as soon as she was close enough.

Santana took a deep breath and gave Brittany a kiss. On the lips. In front of everyone.

"Why now?" I whispered.

"Because I don't want you to suffer anymore." They continued walking down the hall, hand in hand, everyone's eyes still on them. Brittany didn't know how to react.

"Brittany, I want you to tell me what's been going on, or I swear to god I am going to beat the fuck out of anyone who dares come near you." Santana said. "You are a mess. A beautiful mess, and when you're a mess, I'm a tragedy. I am staying at yours tonight, and no way are you getting away from it, you're stuck with me B. Why are you keeping secrets?"

"Everyone has secrets." Brittany sighed "I wish I could tell you."

"No B. Not Santana and Brittany." Santana replied.

"Me and you against the world." Brittany said.

"I'll give you time to make sense out of whatever it is babe okay, but you'll have to tell me tonight. No exceptions. I can't promise I won't beat any shitheads up." Santana said.

The day continued like it had that morning. Stares, evil looks, and kisses from Santana.

**Sorry guys, this chapter is not too good. It's a little rushed; I promise next chapter or the one after that Santana will find out ok. **


	9. Chapter 9

**I was going to wait and let you all suffer until tomorrow, but then I realised I had nothing else to do, so here have an early Christmas present, here's chapter 9!**

"Do you want to get anything from your house babe?" Brittany asked, wincing at the pain trying to buy more thinking time.

"Um... no babe, can you drop me off there first though, so I can put all my school stuff away, and tell my mum? You can go home, I'll walk up to your house after I cook my mum dinner, because chances are mum'll be too tired. I promise it won't take long."

"Okay babe." Brittany was pleased she had managed at least a few minutes of thinking time.

By the time Brittany drove round to Santana's house, she was panicking.

"Right, I'll see you in about 15." Santana got out of Brittany's car and made her way to the other side to give Brittany a peck.

Brittany drove home slowly, no rush in getting there. She was trying to think of something to tell.

A few minutes later, Brittany finally made her way home. She reached for the key in her pocket, and clutched it tightly in her hand. She held on to it instantly knowing what was coming next. She held onto it tighter and her hands bled. She hoped Santana wouldn't walk in, in the midst of it all. She'd hate for Santana to find out that way. She took a deep breath and plunged the key into the hole; she twisted it and opened the door. Her dad was waiting for her. He looked angry. His fists clenched down by his side.

He smirked. "Where was my lunch?"

Brittany couldn't remember stepping inside, but she was anyway. Brittany couldn't remember closing the door, and that was because she hadn't. Brittany couldn't remember being on the floor. She couldn't remember the tears forming around her eyes. She couldn't remember when exactly her heart had decided to sink so much further. She couldn't remember why her dad was hitting her, she couldn't remember because there was no reason. How can you remember something that never existed? Her dad was kicking her in her tummy. Brittany dared not flinch at the pain. She just lay there, helpless and broken.

Santana stood at their living room door looking for a brief second, when she suddenly pushed Brittany's dad away from Brittany. Santana's worst nightmare had just been confirmed. She knew all along, and she just realised. She knew, even before Brittany started acting weird, but she did nothing. She looked down at her friend on the floor. She was still so beautiful.

Santana screamed, and punched Brittany's dad. She pushed him down and kicked him, exactly like he was kicking Brittany a few seconds ago.

"Stop." Brittany cried.

Santana stopped and looked at her friend, feeling so guilty.

"I'm so sorry Brittany. I know you know I knew deep down. Please forgive me, I'm so sorry." Santana cried, with a crying Brittany in her arms. "I'll be back baby." Santana got up and ran up the stairs. She grabbed everything of Brittany's and stuffed it in a bunch of bags that Santana could find. She ran back downstairs and took Brittany's car key. She opened it and chucked all of Brittany's stuff in. She ran back inside to apologise some more. "Come on babe, I'll take you home."

"It wasn't your fault babe, you knew but you didn't really." Brittany tried to comfort Santana

**dsjfskghdfg. I thought this chapter would be better but I was having trouble getting the image from my head into words, sorry guys. This'll have to do. ALSO, just to clarify confusion Santana unconsciously knew, she didn't know and ignored it. Lol I tried to make it clear but I don't know my brain stopped functioning! Haha in my head this story is a hundred times sadder, I'm not a very good writer. **


	10. Chapter 10

**Wasn't planning on updating today because I only got 1 review on chapter 9, and thanks by the way, but then we just won a rounder's tournament, so I'm in a good mood. Here's a short one**

_[Brittany's point of view.]_

We just lay there on her bed waiting for a word to be said. We just lay there waiting for one another to fall asleep, so we could cry, without fear of making the other person guilty. We lay there holding onto each other tightly. We lay there under the duvet, hiding from reality. I felt safe in her arms. I wish she felt safe in mine. We were both facing the ceiling. It was all the same, the white ceiling; you could see little cracks, and the light. I shuffled a little; I wanted to see Santana's face. Even if I didn't need to, I knew exactly how she looked in my mind, and I know she knows how I look. I faced her, and she faced me. Tears were cornering on both our eyes. I crashed my lips onto hers, desperate to feel safe. Every part of my body hurt, and every part of Santana's hurt from all the emotional pain she felt. She pulled back.

"I'm so sorry." Her voice quavered. I just really wanted to cry. "Cry babe, its okay. I'm here." I wondered if she could read my mind, like she had some extra terrestrial powers. I started to sob, and she held me tighter. My eyes were stinging, and all my bruises were sensitive. They felt like stabs on my body. I felt so unclean, and dirty. I felt like I was a burden, I felt like I was, like I was a failure. The biggest failure that had walked on earth. I felt so dumb. I started to shake, and cry even harder. Santana held still, I could tell that she thought if she even just moved a little, her tears would all come back out. I thought it was unfair of me to let her suffer so much. It was a million stabs to the heart; it was a million times worse than all my scars and bruises. I slowly quietened my sobbing until I stopped. I would've carried on, but I wanted Santana to feel better, so I pretended to fall asleep. She started to cry, she knew I wasn't asleep but I was still acting like I was. She couldn't hold her tears anymore; I knew that more than she did. Her cries sounded so painful, her cried sounded so powerful and heartfelt.

_[Brittany's point of view end.]_

_All through the night Santana cried, and apologised a million times to a fake sleeping Brittany who kept her tears in._

**So guys review please, also what would you like to happen? And will you suggest good Brittana fics for me (m rated, I find k, and t's a little boring, lol shoot me)? All of mine are near their end :( **


	11. Chapter 11

**Urg guys, it's finally the weekend! I have waited all week for this, lolol. **

_[Santana's pov]_

I woke up the next day, tired as hell. The tears on my cheek were dried, the pain in my heart was still there, and the girl in my arm was controlling her tears. I turned to check if she was awake or not. I was surprised to see a pair of blue eyes staring into my brown ones. I needed to say something. Why hadn't I done something before? She didn't deserve me I am a failure.

"I-I'm so sorry. Are you okay? No stupid question, I am so sorry Brittany. I, I should have helped, I should- I'm sorry." I stopped. I didn't want her to feel any worse than she did. A rush of guilt washed over me. My mouth was dry, and my eyes were nearly spilling tears.

"Babe, I'm sorry, I didn't tell you, I just, just didn't know what would happen. Like what about my sister? I'm not old enough to take care of a 7 year old, they're going to take her away from me babe, they will and I don't want to lose any more people. I can't cope with it, please Santana promise me they won't take her away." She was pleading. It was like her world was crashing in front of her, and the only person she trusted was me. Me. I'm the most unreliable person here. I can't do this. I can't let her heart break into another million pieces. I can't let that happen again. My heart was crushing itself so hard. It felt like it was about to explode. I couldn't say a word, I couldn't. I looked away and I shed a quick tear.

"Santana?" Her voice was quavering, she was fragile. "Santana please tell me they won't take her away." I can't. I can't babe. I just wanted to tell the truth. My heart was crushed and kicked around. She started crying and my heart started to falter. I turned on my side, and faced her, my tears threatening to spill over the edges. She couldn't look at me; I grabbed her arm and made her face me.

"Shhh babe." I wanted to say it was going to be okay, but anyone from the outside world could tell from a million miles that it wasn't and won't be okay. Not yet anyway. Maybe someday. Maybe.

We laid there for what seemed like a century, just waiting until it all just passed without our help. We laid there dreading what was to come.

**Guise reviews! Thanks!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Hello guys, I've started writing another fic called 'The Route to Life' check it out please? Anyway thank you for the reviews.**

Both girls were quiet under the duvet, when a rumbling sound suddenly broke their record of silence.

"Babe are you hungry?" Santana asked Brittany.

"No." Brittany's voice was broken and crackling. The rumbling noise came back.

"I am not having you starve yourself. I am going to get up and make you pancakes, and then we can talk."

"No..." Brittany hesitated. "I mean no, I don't want to talk, not yet. Please..." she closed her eyes for a brief moment trying to make plans. "I-It's Q's birthday in 3 days... We can... I don't know. She w-wanted to talk to you and me." Santana gave her a look.

"Brittany as much as I'd like to run away from all of this, I can't. This is real, and this happened. We need to sort it out, and get over it." Santana sighed. Brittany started to cry a little. She knew Santana was right, but she wasn't ready. Not yet.

"Babe, please don't cry."

"Sany, please promise me you won't call the police, please let the whole thing just take its course. Please babe." Brittany was hyperventilating; she looked like she was having asthma attack.

"Shhh babe, don't strain yourself B. It's not good for you." Santana tried but Brittany wasn't calming down anytime soon. She grunted and finally made a promise. Santana never broke a promise, at least not with Brittany. "Urg. Fine. But know that if they even come near you again, I am going to beat their asses out, and if I have to I'll kill them. I mean it B. I don't care if I go to jail, or if I become a shame to the whole world. But you have to stop crying. Crying won't get us anywhere, and we have to deal with this B, there's no running." Santana took a deep breath not believing that she actually promised. "Like you said B, me and you against the world." She whispered, stroking Brittany's cheek lightly. Brittany started to calm down a little. Santana got up and let go of Brittany.

"Don't leave me. Please." Brittany sat up and looked down at her bruise covered lap. "I can't do this without you."

"I won't ever, ever leave you." Santana took Brittany's face in her hands. "I promise. Now, get up, we have some plans to make with Q. Come on, I'll have a shower with you." Santana forced a smile. Brittany chuckled at Santana's attempt to smile, which made Santana smile properly.

"See, there I prefer happy Britt." Santana smiled. She took Brittany's hand and led her to the bathroom.

**So guys, I forgot about Quitt, so she's coming in the story in about 2 chapters. And again please check out my other story (The Route to Life.) Thank you. Reviews are much appreciated. **


	13. Chapter 13

**Guys why have you not checked my other story out? :((((((( Also, I am sorry I didn't update yesterday I was in London for the whole day and don't expect an update tomorrow because I have a rounder's match and I'll doubt I'll be up for some writing. (Oh and I wrote this chapter in London.)**

"Thank you."

"For what babe?" Santana was confused.

"For this, for everything, for... for you." Brittany was ashamed that she has just basically "forced" herself in Santana's home. Even if this wasn't her fault. She looked down at her feet. Santana and Brittany were still on their way to the bathroom.

"No, thank YOU."

"Wh-" Brittany was interrupted by Santana.

"Pshpsh enough! We have a shower waiting for us!" Santana smirked.

Santana reached for the door handle to open the door. She swung it open and walked in with Brittany. She started getting herself undressed. Brittany looked frightened. Santana noticed her refusal and stopped. She held on to Brittany's hand and gave it a squeeze.

"It's okay." She said. Brittany gulped and froze.

"W-will you do it for me?" She had tears in the corners of her eyes. Brittany realised how silly it sounded. "I mean, I-if you want to, like you d-don't have to... I mean-"

Santana reached for Brittany's shirt carefully lifting it above Brittany's head. Santana smirked and whispered "You're like my little babe, you are, you precious thing."

Her smirk faded when she saw Brittany's stomach covered in bruises. Santana was beating herself up in her head. She reached out her hand to graze over Brittany's abs, but she looked up as if asking for permission. Brittany nodded and closed her eyes. Santana lightly grazed over her abs, the touch burning their skin. Santana's throat was slowly closing up and her guilt was threatening to spill over the edge. Brittany sensed Santana's now tensed body and opened her eyes to look into Santana's eyes. "Don't beat yourself up; it wasn't your fault... I-it was mine." Brittany closed her eyes tight.

"WHAT?" Santana retracted her hand back to her side. "Don't you dare blame this on yourself B. This, this wasn't your fault." Santana was angry that she had let Brittany think that this was all her fault. She calmed down because anger won't land them any prizes. Santana cupped Brittany's face savouring the sensation. "I'm sorry. Come on now." She unclasped Brittany's bra and undid Brittany's trousers. They stepped in the shower hand in hand, heart on tongue, and tears too far to be seen.

After their shared shower Santana made some pancakes for Brittany and herself. Santana tried to talk to Brittany about things, but Brittany always steered her attention from the subject. Santana knew Brittany was avoiding it, but she figured that she shouldn't press Brittany's buttons, not while she was so tore and broken.

"You're so beautiful." Santana was just lovingly staring at her... what? Friend? Girlfriend? Best friend? Lover? Soul mate? Santana wasn't sure, it needed to be sorted out, but she wasn't sure just when. She didn't realise what had come out of her mouth. Brittany blushed and gave her a shy smile.

"So are you babe." Santana shuffled in her chair, unsure of what to say next.

"Right come on, I bet Quinn thinks we're having wild lesbian sex right now. I told them we would come over an hour ago. What are we going to say about..."

"Nothing." Brittany sighed. "... I don't know."

**Quinn is in the next chapter! Reviews please, and check out my other fic? Thanks.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Right I know I said I wouldn't update but I think I did quite well today so I'm in a good mood.**

"Hello Q... Yeah... yeah I know I said we would be there about an hour ago but... yeah... ok we're on our way... and sorry." Quinn was getting fed up of waiting. The two girls have just made their way out the door. Brittany was frightened. Santana couldn't help but notice. She was taking her whole being gay thing to the next level but she wanted, or maybe even needed to go slow with it. It was a sensitive subject for Santana. She was thankful that a lot of things have come up and hit them in the face, before Brittany would be asking Santana to run for prom or something similar. However she wasn't thankful to the fact that her Brittany had been hurt. She had been hurt and Santana had no idea how to deal with it. She had promised not to call the cops. She had promised and she wasn't about to go and ruin the trust between them. She inhaled deeply and took Brittany's hands in hers. Brittany knew exactly what Santana had in mind.

"You know, you don't have to. It's okay." Brittany didn't let go of Santana's hand nonetheless. She was afraid that if she let go, she would fall to the ground. They both knew what was coming next.

"It's okay." Santana forced a smile, and squeezed Brittany's hand, she was also afraid of falling to the ground if she let go.

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><p>"Finally!" Quinn nearly growled as she saw her friends walking up to her. She was sitting on the bench looking fed up. "Where have you be...?" Her voice faded away as the two girls came closer in to view. There was no smiles, and no pleasantries present. Where a frown sat in Quinn's mouth was now an O. The duo knew exactly what she had seen. She had seen the bruises and cuts on Brittany's face. She had seen their hands attached to each other like a sandwich. It wasn't much of a surprise to Quinn but she hadn't thought Santana would be so 'ready'.<p>

"What... what happened?" Quinn gasped.

"Not here. Let's go over to yours." Santana was firm. She could feel her knees buckling before her. She wasn't sure how she was going to deal with this. She thought she should get it together for Brittany.

Brittany was scared. She didn't want to tell Quinn. She didn't want to tell anyone. She wished nothing had happened. She wished and wished that she would just wake up and realise that this was some sick dream. Her throat was forming a lump, a lump that could only be felt. It was a big lump that was going to be in place for a long time.

**Short chapter, sorry, well Quinn is in this one, but I promise to write more in depth about Quinn soon! And thank you guys for reviewing and checking my other fic.**


	15. Chapter 15

**All the fics I'm reading have Brittany and Santana break up or have one of them die, or both, no happy Brittana :(, though I must say they are all fab.**

They walked to Quinn's house in silence. Santana was trying to keep calm in her state of mind. She was trying to make this situation less 'threatening' for Brittany and Quinn. She was failing. How can you tell someone that your best friend has just been abused by their own parents, how do you tell someone that you promised not to call the cops, how do you tell someone that you basically promised not to sort it all out. Quinn was trying not to ask any questions. Her hands were fidgeting in her pockets and she was getting hot and bothered. She didn't like seeing this normally cheery girl upset. It seemed like the whole world was wrong. Brittany was a second sun. Brittany was trying not to run away. She just really wanted to hide from everything. She wanted to take Santana and her sister with her, and live on a rainbow somewhere. She wanted to live happily ever after with Santana and her sister on a rainbow without fear of reality.

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><p>They walked up the stairs of Quinn's house in silence. They were glad that her parents weren't home to see Brittany like that. As soon as they got inside Quinn's bedroom, she started to cry. Brittany and Santana were confused. Why was Quinn crying? Wasn't that supposed to be Brittany? Brittany was so close to tears. But she didn't want to. She didn't want to make Santana uncomfortable.<p>

"I-I'm sorry... it's, it's just that..." Quinn was frantically gasping for air. Brittany sat beside Quinn and wiped her tears away.

"Shhh honey, it's okay." Santana couldn't help but marvel at how sweet Brittany was. Brittany was the one who was hurt, and she was the one comforting Quinn. Quinn stopped crying. She took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry, the bruises on your face... they, they remind me of the time when," Quinn gulped. "When my dad hit my mum, and, and that led to their divorce..." Santana and Brittany's jaws were left open. They had no idea this was what really happened. Quinn's mum told everyone that he had an affair. "W-what happened?" Quinn reached her hand out to graze Brittany's cheek. The touch burnt her and she pulled back abruptly. Brittany looked at Santana, as if she was sending a telepathic message. Santana took a deep breath getting herself ready for what was to come.

"Her, her parents were abusing her." She spat the words out, leaving a trail of stinging sensation in her mouth. Her guilt was washing over her again. How could she just leave her like that? Brittany was so close to crying. Santana ran over to Brittany holding her tight across her own body, she held her for two reasons. One, she was making herself known; she was almost saying I'm here, in fear of another heartbreak. Two, she was holding her for her own benefit. She felt like she was going to fall to hell. They were lost in each other's embrace. They forgot about Quinn. Quinn's jaw was wide open. Her eyes were closed. She had known, of course she did. But no matter how long she had known, no amount of time would prepare her for what she needed to do. She backed up to her wall knocking anything on her way down. The noise disrupted the lovers embrace. They looked around the room frantic to know what the fuck was going on. They knew what was going on. It was obvious.

"QUINN NO!" Santana was panicking. She knew Brittany wasn't ready yet, and she knew she would be sent into the depth of hell. "NO, NO, NO." Quinn neared her destination. Santana knew no matter how much shouting she did, she wouldn't stop Quinn. Brittany's sight was being clouded by a tornado of tears. She let it all go. She heard every single drop, dance on her cheek and drop to the ground with a big thud.

"Quinn..." Brittany's voice faltered. She opened her mouth to say something, anything, but the lump in her throat had blocked out any words. Her heart raced and her hands clenched at her sides. She knew it would happen sometime. But she didn't think it would be so soon. She ran out of the room, not quite sure how she was going to play this one. She tried to escape this feeling of being so lost and broken.

Quinn picked her phone up, dialling the number. Santana knew it was too late. She ran out of Quinn's door and followed Brittany.

"Britt!" She was panicking and she needed Brittany to keep her calm.

Brittany ran ignoring the voice she always listened to. She ran knowing that Santana would be following her wherever she went. She ran crying, and clutching her heart to try and stop the pain that was taking over her whole body. She needed to get away. She ran to her house, not caring about the people who were watching her. She knew they would come soon. She slammed the door open and started to call for her sister. Her house smelled like failure. It smelt like her. She felt like a failure. She heard footsteps running over to her. She sighed when she thought it was her sister, but instead she re-met her parents. Her heart started to force itself up her throat and on her tongue. Her eyes felt like exploding. She stood there helpless. It was only a matter of time before they would start to hit her again, it was only a matter of time before Santana would run into this again, it was only a matter of time before her sister would come rushing over, it was only a matter of time before the cops would come, and it wasn't enough time.

**Wahahaha, I feel mean leaving a mini cliff hanger. I'm quite proud because my chapters are getting longer and I don't even try. yeeyyyy~~ Reviews? I like feedback**


	16. Chapter 16

**I'm sorry for the confusion, I thought it was pretty obvious but yes, Quinn called the cops, haha no Quinn didn't kill herself! Anyway, I've been thinking, should I end this story soon with a cliff hanger and a twist, then write 2 sequels to it? I have a brief idea of what to do, but I don't know? Do you want this story to have a clean ending? Or a cliff hanger and 2 sequels? Will you guys read the sequels and review? I promise it will be two good sequels! Also, I think I am going to have to put "The Route to Life" on hiatus; I want to focus on this story. Plus, I have been avoiding naming Brittany's sister, because I suck at names, but I guess I'm going to have to now. So consider it Beatrice. It doesn't suit her sister, but it's the only name that I can think of.**

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><p>"Beatrice?" Brittany backed herself up to the nearest wall, like she was scared a beast would attack her at any moment. "... Where are you?" Her voice was faltering. Her parents were watching her with strict ridden horror eyes.<p>

"Where the fuck have you been?" Her mother's voice was calm. "How dare you try and put this family to shame?" Her voice was getting louder. Brittany was pushing herself back on the wall hoping it would give away. Her mother walked towards Brittany. "While you were out there doing whatever it is you do, me and your father have been slaving for ourselves." Their faces were only a few centimetres away. "Cooking, cleaning, you name it. How dare you?"

It started. The hits, the hidden tears, and the pain. The insults that came from her fathers and her mother's mouth hurt more than the hits. She was used to the physical pain, but no matter how much emotional pain she had already felt, nothing would dull down the pain. She kept quiet, slightly whimpering.

Santana was at the door. She could hear the shouts. She could hear them even if she was a million miles away. She could hear the loud slapping noise; her heart broke into a million pieces. She ran into the house not knowing what the fuck she was going to do. She saw them there, her mum crouched over Brittany. Brittany was now on the floor, not trying to shield herself from the hits. She wasn't crying, but Santana could feel the gut clenching feeling that Brittany was feeling. Beatrice was by the staircase watching, she was scared. She held onto a bear that Brittany had given her for her 4th birthday.

Santana ran over to where Brittany was and pushed her mum, she would have fallen on the ground if Brittany's father wasn't there to catch the slumbering cow. Santana was so angry she forgot what she was cursing off about. She never forgot Brittany's presence though. Santana's heart was being twisted a million times, and her blood was stinging with hatred. She felt her blood rush around her body, leaving hatred everywhere. Brittany slouched on the ground, scared to death.

Then she heard it. She heard the loud noise of the police cars rushing over. Santana heard it to, and stopped. She froze and she ran over to Brittany, she held her tight. Brittany's parents were clouded by their dumbness. They had no idea what was going on, until it was too late. The cops had already reached them, and there was enough evidence there to prove the statement Quinn gave them. There were enough witnesses to recount the story, and there were enough bruises on Brittany's skin.

Brittany tried to get up to run over to her sister but she kept falling back into Santana's arms.

"B, I'm sorry... so sorry. I, I love you... please don't forget me." It was Brittany. She was whispering to her sister. Brittany couldn't force any voice to come out, so she just whispered. Santana's throat closed up. Hearing Brittany say goodbye to her sister broke her heart. The cops walked in, there were two of them. One rushed over to Brittany to check if she was alright, the other took Brittany's parents. Santana was surprised that they weren't trying to fight them off. She figured this was because they hadn't figured what was going on yet, and as soon as they did it would be too late.

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><p>It was a blur. They were now suddenly outside, Brittany in Santana's arms. A new car had come up now. A woman came out of the car and walked over to Beatrice, she whispered something in her ear causing Beatrice to drop the bear on the floor.<p>

The bear slumped; it reminded Santana of Brittany just a few minutes (?) ago. Brittany realised what was going on, and was now running. She was screaming, but she wasn't getting anywhere Santana held her tight. It was the right thing to do. Brittany knew she wouldn't see her sister ever again, and Santana knew that too. She kept strong for Brittany. Beatrice disappeared into the car and the car disappeared to the corner.

"...I love you." Brittany whispered to the wind. Her voice was broken, and she was tore. Santana's gut clenched.

The cops walked over to the girls, Brittany was sobbing into Santana's shoulders. Santana couldn't form any words to try comfort Brittany. No amount of words could comfort her. The cops talked to Santana, but Santana wasn't listening. She heard something like it was okay for Brittany to stay with her until something. She was relieved they weren't going to take Brittany away. She needed to listen to the cops, but how could she when her best friend was crying on her shoulders. She couldn't move, and she could hardly breathe.

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><p>It was another blur. Santana peeled her eyes open to see what was going on, it was dark. Brittany was crying quietly next to Santana. Seeing Brittany like this made Santana's stomach churn. She sat up and she realised she was in her bedroom.<p>

There was a moment of silence before Santana reached over and held Brittany. The touch was burning both of them. Santana opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out.

"I-I'm sorry." Brittany was gasping for air.

"Shhh, breathe Britt."

Brittany tried to muffle her cries into the pillow underneath her. She tried to calmed down, and she Santana laid back down. Brittany faced Santana on the bed, tears were settling on her face. Santana fiddled with Brittany's hair. It was a comfort thing for the both of them.

"I love you. I promise we'll get through this." Santana's voice was assuring Brittany. They fell into a dreamless sleep in each others arms.

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><p><strong>So guys, I want to know if you would read the sequels? There should be about maybe 8+ chapters to this story, and then I will start on the sequels. Reviews<strong>


	17. Chapter 17

**To an anon review, I would use Sophie but I've already called her Beatrice and if I change it, it might confuse some people, but thanks for the suggestion! Sequel it is then guys :) I had a chaotic day, so this chapter is going to be short and snappy. Sorry, but it's better than not updating right.**

Santana woke up a few minutes after Brittany woke up. Santana woke up next to no-one. She panicked. She jumped up on her feet and started to look for Brittany. She was concerned. She didn't know the extent of the damage all the things had on Brittany, and Santana wasn't ever going to let Brittany out of her sight. She knew this was a forever thing, she would be scarred for life, and no-one not even Santana could heal her scar up. This worried Santana more than anything, she wasn't used to having Brittany hurt. She wasn't used to seeing Brittany hurt _and_ not being able to do anything but stare. She walked down the stairs and checked the kitchen. There she saw Brittany head in hands. She wasn't crying. She wasn't sleeping.

"B?" Santana couldn't force anything but a whisper out. Brittany lifted her head and looked at Santana. Brittany genuinely smiled at her. Santana genuinely smiled back.

"...are you alright?" Brittany was asking Santana, it wasn't the other way round.

"No. Maybe. I don't know. Are you?" Santana knew the answer even if Brittany wasn't going to say it out loud. Brittany shrugged. Santana walked up next to Brittany and wrapped her arms around her.

"I'm so sorry Brittany. I'm sorry I couldn't prevent all of _this_. It's all my fault. I promised you, ages ago, that I would always be there for you, and, and I wasn't. I'm sorry." Santana was gasping for air. Brittany rubbed Santana's back.

"S... you are there for me, you're here aren't you? I'm staying at your house aren't I? _I'm _sorry, for dumping myself on you, I'll go if, if you don't want me here..." Brittany knew Santana wanted her there, but she just wanted her to say it to her. She needed to feel some love.

"B, you know full well that I want you here. Don't be sorry." They hugged each other once more, holding on tighter than the last time. They let go, and stared at each other for a few seconds.

"What about... Quinn? It's her birthday tomorrow. Are... you mad?" Santana broke the silence. Brittany sighed. She didn't know how she felt about anyone but Santana, especially not now. She had no idea if she was mad or not.

_She was only doing the right thing right?_

"No. I don't know, but why should I be mad? She did this, because she thought," She paused at the word thought. "She thought it was for the best, even if it maybe wasn't. No scratch that, it was for the best. I'm not mad, she cares and who am I to cut her out of my life?" Santana smiled at how nice Brittany was. This was Brittany; she always put everyone before herself.

"You know, you don't have to be so strong all the time. It's okay to be angry, as long as you forgive, it's okay because I'll always be by your side, and I promise, like it's written in the stars, that I will _always, always, always_ love you." Santana grazed Brittany's bruised cheek. Brittany looked up to meet Santana's eyes.

"Promise?" She looked frightened.

"Promise." Santana took her pinkie out, and Brittany linked hers with Santana's

**Thanks guys, reviews please.**


	18. Chapter 18

**About the glee clubbers, um I don't know, maybe I'll give them more involvement after the twist. lolol you can tell that if glee was in my hands it'd be Brittana every scene. I'm a little bummed that Chord Overstreet is out, what's going to happen to Mercedes!1**

_A week later. (That week was all the same, comfort and stuff.)_

Brittany was usually where she was recently; she was on Santana's bed, looking out the window, and thinking. Santana was also, usually where she was, with Brittany. She had been unsure of how slow to take things. Decisions about Beatrice and Brittany and Brittany's parents had taken place yesterday. Brittany didn't know, and Santana knew Brittany had a right to know, if she wanted to. Santana's mother attended the hearing. She wanted to know what would happen. Brittany was old enough to be living on her own, so not much was said about Brittany's whereabouts. She took a deep breath, and got ready to ask or tell Brittany about it all.

"B...?" Santana was frightened; she didn't want to get Brittany upset all over again. Brittany didn't say anything; instead she looked over to Santana and forced a smile. "Yesterday, B don't get upset but decisions... decisions about you, your parents and, and" Santana paused. "Beatrice, were made yesterday... I know you have a right to know, so, um do you want to know what's happening?"

Brittany froze when she heard Santana say her sister's name. She didn't want to know, she didn't want to cry. She shook her head, and dismissed the subject.

"Well, B, just so you know, you're free to go anywhere. You're old to be living on your own, and you're welcome here forever and ever." Brittany leaned in and pecked Santana. They hadn't taken anymore steps to this coming out of the closet thing, bigger things have come up.

"S, Quinn called this morning, she wants to meet up with me, but can you come, please?" Santana smiled.

"Of course babe. I'm going to get changed, if you need anything just shout okay?"

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><p>The two girls walked down the street hand in hand, in silence. Brittany hated all the silence recently, she hated all the looks everyone gave her, even if they were sympathy looks, Brittany didn't want anyone's sympathy. She guessed that the story's been on the paper.<p>

"Where are we going?" Santana decided to break the silence. She squeezed Brittany's hand.

"In, in the café." Brittany tensed because she couldn't take it anymore; she hated being centre of attention.

"It's okay." Santana could do nothing but watch her best friend fall apart.

When they reached the café they spotted Quinn. Quinn looked nervous, nearly as nervous as Brittany. Santana was the only one trying to mask her feelings. Santana was good at that, hiding.

They walked up to her. Brittany was the first to say something.

"Hey" She sighed.

"Hey... B I'm sorry, I just, I couldn't help seeing you so tore and, and-" She was cut off.

"Quinn, you don't have to apologise every time you see me. I'm not angry."

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><p>Their day was a mixture of awkward silences, sympathy stares from the outside world, and reassuring words from Santana. Santana was like the peace keeper, she was the person who kept everyone calm.<p>

**Not many more chapters left, I promise next chapter will have more things going on with it. I think maybe I'll cut it straight to the twist, so I think maybe 3 more chapters left to this story and then I'll get started on the sequels :) **


	19. Chapter 19

**Okay, I'll settle with one review on my previous chapter, because it was pretty useless. READ: This is NOT the twist, but I kind of want this to happen before the twist. Oh and I just kind of skipped Santana and Brittany going to school? **

_2 days later._

Today was a special day. It was a day that Brittany had forgotten about. It was the day she would turn 18. It had been a few weeks since _it _happened, but the pain still hasn't subsided. Everything she saw, everything she smelt and everything she tasted reminded her of her sister and her parents. She had gotten better at hiding her feelings, which meant to everyone else but her and Santana, she was nearly healed. However she was far from being healed. She was still broken, but how do you heal something that won't admit to being broken?

18 meant a lot of things, it meant she could go to clubs, she could buy cigarettes, and she could place bets and even use the phrase 'back in the day.' But Brittany didn't care; Brittany didn't know it was her birthday because she forgot. There is one person, though, who did not forget, and that was Santana. Santana never forgot anything that had an association to Brittany.

It was the morning. They were led down on Santana's bed facing the ceiling, eyes wide open. They knew that they were both awake, but neither one of them wanted to disturb the peaceful silence that had fallen between them. But just like before, there was a rumbling noise that disturbed it anyway. Santana couldn't help but giggle.

"Are you hungry?" Santana sat up to smile at Brittany. Brittany nodded. Santana leant down to kiss Brittany, Brittany smiled in the kiss, and Santana wished Brittany a happy birthday in the kiss. They made out for ages that morning. But Santana broke the kiss, only to have Brittany moan.

"Must get the birthday girl some breakfast!"

"I'm not hungry..." Her tummy rumbled again. Santana chuckled. Brittany rolled her eyes. "Let's eat later. Can we cuddle some more?" Santana awed.

"Wait, hang on." Brittany moaned. "Hang on! You're so impatient babe!" Santana pecked Brittany and got up from the bed. She walked over to her closet and started to dig around. She took out a small box, and smiled. She turned around, with the box placed firmly in her hand.

"W-what's that?" Brittany wasn't sure how to react.

"Think fast!" Santana chucked the small box to Brittany. Brittany caught it, much to Santana's surprise. "Open it."

Brittany sat up, and looked at the box in her hand. She hesitated, but took the lid off of it. Inside was another box, a ring box. She took it out and placed it on her palm. She froze a little.

"Go on then! Open it, I'm getting old here!" Santana smiled, causing Brittany to smile back.

She opened the box, and inside sat two rings. They were two gold rings. They looked expensive. Brittany stared and Santana chuckled.

"They're promise rings babe. One of them has your name engraved on it, the other has mine in."

Brittany smiled. The biggest smile she had worn since her sister was taken. She shuffled on the bed and reached for Santana. Their embrace didn't burn, it was a warm embrace.

"Thank you, I love it. I love you." Brittany hugged tighter. Santana smiled. "They look expensive... How did you have enough money for them?"

"I've been saving up since your last birthday! Totally worth it."

Santana took the box from Brittany; she took one ring out and examined the insides of it. It said 'Santana.' Santana took Brittany's right hand and placed the ring on Brittany's ring finger.

"One day, I am going to marry you, and I will get you an even better ring." Santana blushed at how cheesy she sounded. "I love you."

Brittany took the other ring out of the box, and looked inside, just because she was curious. It said 'Brittany.' She smiled, and like Santana had done with her, took Santana's right hand and placed the ring on her ring finger. Once she had, she kissed her hand.

"Thank you so much, Santana, for everything. I owe you more than you'll ever know." They embraced once more.

"Come on now, how about a birthday shower with me?" Santana winked.

* * *

><p>After their shower they went downstairs. They were both met by Santana's parents who wished Brittany a happy birthday and a hug. They made excuses to leave the house, because Santana had asked if they could have the house to themselves.<p>

Once Santana's parents had gone, Santana walked to the kitchen. Brittany followed. On the kitchen counter lay a cake, and a bunch of cards and present from Santana, Santana's parents and Brittany's friends.

"Wow! It's like Christmas!" Santana chuckled. Brittany was half back. At least, today she was.

"Do you want them to come over?"

"No." Brittany pouted. "I mean, yeah sure, but later." She smiled.

* * *

><p>The glee club came over at about 8. They didn't have any alcohol around, which was quite odd, considering this was a Brittany and Santana party. They just hung out, and talked about things. That night Brittany forgot about her feelings, she came back. She was back for that night.<p>

**I wasn't sure how to end this, but yeah. This chapter took way too much time to write, I had about an hour break after eve****ry paragraph to recollect my thoughts. Well anyway, I hope you like this, and reviews are appreciated.**


	20. Chapter 20

**First of all, sorry for not updating yesterday, I was waiting for more reviews, but none came :( also, I was too busy freaking out about the HeYa kiss ****(still freaking out now)****, and I also didn't want to spoil the mood. READ: THIS IS NOT THE END. Also please don't expect an update on Thursday because I am going to London once again. So when I come back, I am to expect a lot of reviews yes? ;)**

[ Brittany's pov. ]

My eyes peeled open to reveal a blur of colours that at first didn't make sense. My arm was wrapped around a beautiful Latina's body. We were impossibly close, I wasn't quite sure why, but then I realised I was on the couch. I looked around the room and no-body had gone home. At this point I realised I was holding my breath. _Why? Maybe because I was trying not to wake anyone up?_ I inhaled, and then it hit me, and I remembered. I remembered everything, and I wish I'd forgotten. The pain was so much more painful than I had remembered. I clutched my chest to try and stop the throbbing pain my heart made, but it didn't work. My eyes were quickly becoming a pool of tears. I squeezed my eyes shut and caught the falling tears on my cheeks. I opened my eyes to see if my loud gasps for air had woken anyone up. On the floor was Puck passed out next to Finn. Tina and Mercedes were on the smaller couch snuggled together. Sam and Kurt were also on the floor. Rachel and Quinn were on chairs. _I wonder how they can sleep on chairs like that._ Artie was by the doorway on his wheelchair slightly drooling. Mike was sat on the floor cross legged, on his phone. No-one but me and Mike were awake.

The more time I spent in the same position on the couch the more uncomfortable I got. I shuffled to try and be free of Santana's grasp. I needed some space. It was difficult because I was trying not to wake anyone up.

"Mike a little help?" The hushed whisper came out of my mouth before I could think twice. He came closer to me and Santana carefully avoiding treading on anyone. He put his hand out in front of him waiting for me to take it, but Santana had her hands on both of my arms. It sort of felt like she was holding on to me, like she knew I would fall apart without her. It was like she thought I would disappear. Mike noticed that I wasn't able to move, so he put his hands under my armpits and lifted me. I felt like superman, only more helpless. He must be really strong. He lifted me and placed me down to the nearest place I could be placed on. He nearly stumbled back onto Finn as he placed me down. Without Santana's comforting grasps, I also nearly stumbled over to Artie. I felt weak, I felt like I could be split in half by just the softest touch. Thankfully I got my balance in time. My blood was filled with emotion and leaving trails of stinging sensations all around my body. I tried to stop it all, because I nearly squealed. My eyes were watering, and my knees were trembling. I couldn't hold on anymore and my knees gave away, just as I was about to hit the floor, a firm grasp caught me. I looked up and was surprised to see Mike. Mike was never really there for me, it was always Santana, his touch burnt my skin. I couldn't flinch back because I simply had no energy left. He took me to the kitchen, never taking his hands of my shoulders. It was an awkward position but I was thankful. Without his grasp, I would end up on the floor. He led me to a chair, and I sat down, I slouched and brought my hands to my face before the waterworks started. I clenched my face and forced my tears back down. I was being strangled; a lump in my throat was expanding and preventing me from breathing. Mike came over to me firmly holding onto a cup filled with ice cold water. He offered it to me; he hadn't yet said a word. I found this weird, anyone but Santana would have asked me something. A crazy thought formed into my head. _Maybe he understood. _But then I realised he didn't, he was just unsure of what to say. It gave me hope though. For a moment I didn't feel like I was the only one who felt this, but I probably am. He took a step back and he looked at me, I looked back at him, my eyes were glistening with tears waiting to fall around my feet. His gaze shifted away.

"Do you want me to get Santana?" Mike finally broke the uncomfortable silence that fell between us. I looked over to the doorway, because I knew. Santana was there. Her eyes were making a hole on my face. I didn't need to look because I could sense it, and because I knew. Santana probably awoke when our skin stopped touching. No, Santana awoke when our skin stopped touching. I was certain. Mike followed my gaze. "Oh... um... how long have you been there?" Santana averted her gaze from mine, looked to Mike and returned her gaze back to me. "I was just uh-"and just like that he went. He left me and Santana looking at each other, no emotions were written on our faces. I couldn't help it; the silence was threatening to deafen me. I looked away, giving Santana the chance to run to me and hold her arms out, because I knew that she knew I needed her grasp. She took my hands into hers, and the pain in my heart was made bigger. I didn't take my hands back because it still felt good. She took her left hand and grazed my cheek. I was close to crying.

"Hey you." With the sound of her voice it all spilled out, everything. She took my head and placed it into the crook of her neck. My tears were going to get her shirt all wet. I tried to muffle the gasps and wailing I made into her collar bone before it woke everyone up.

"Hang on one second babe, let me just tell them all to go." She let go, and my cries grew uncontrollably louder. She hugged me again, and this time she stood me up and took me with her into the living room. I couldn't stop crying. "Hey guys, uh will you all go home? Sorry." They were all awake; I probably woke them with my cries. I felt like a burden. I could hear shuffling, and one by one they left, Kurt and Quinn pecked me on my cheek, while Santana ran her hands up and down my back. Once they all left Santana took me inside the living room and sat down on the couch we had once been sleeping on. My throat was closing up, and my heart was sinking, it was sinking so far down it felt like it had gone. It felt like my heart was lost, but with one look to my left I found it again. One look at Santana and my heart reappeared, but only to look away and have it disappear all over again. I felt guilty, unexpectedly crying like this. Crying like an idiot without an explanation. But did I need an explanation? This was Santana and she could read my mind. I held my breath and tried to stop my tears falling. I squeezed my eyes shut and I could see her. I could see Beatrice. I reopened my eyes and forced my tears down.

"I'm sorry, I'm so, so, so, sorry. So sorry." I was apologising to Beatrice and Santana. Santana tried to shh away my feelings, but it didn't work. Suddenly there was a buzzing noise to Santana's left. She shuffled a little and shh'd me a little. I stopped crying.

"Hello...? No not right no- I can't- becaus- urg okay fine." She grunted. I knew what was coming; she has to go, because this comfort wasn't too good to last. But it was my chance, it was crazy, but it's the only thing left.

"Babe, I have to go food shopping, do you want to come?" I shook my head, she could go later, but she knows it has to happen. She knows deeps down, she won't fully know until it's too late, and I won't fully understand before it's too late. You can't fight a prophecy. It has to happen, for better or worse. I leaned in and kissed her, she deepened the kiss almost right away. She knew but she didn't. I could feel her gut clenching and I could feel the lump in her throat forming, what a shame it'll all be too late.

"I love you" I said in the kiss.

"I love you too." I pulled back, and everything came back, the lump in my throat was the biggest it had ever been. I took one long look at her, and forced a smile. She forced one back. She stood up and she left. She didn't need to get dressed because she hadn't changed the previous night. I treasured her voice in my mind, and the picture of her. I sat on her couch for a few minutes. I couldn't take it anymore, everything, everything reminded me of her and my parents, everything triggered my feelings. And it was unnatural, it was the only way and I needed to try. I knew I would lose her, but I couldn't help seeing her so upset. I got up from the couch, slightly rocking and made my way upstairs. I took my phone, and a pen and paper, I scribbled words on the paper expressing my feelings; I shed tears on the paper, and as soon as I finished, I took a picture of me and Santana from her shelf and made my way downstairs. I took a deep breath, knowing I was making a mistake, but it was written in the stars. I placed the sheets of paper on the couch and placed my phone on top of it. I clutched the picture in my hand and looked at the promise ring Santana had given me. I took another deep breath.

"I'm so sorry." I whispered to the empty room, and then I left.

**How about that for a cliff hanger? This took me ages to write and drained a lot from me, so I am expecting a lot of reviews, I don't know if I am going to update tomorrow. There are still a few more chapters left. **


	21. Chapter 21

**I wasn't planning on updating today, but my match was cancelled, so here's chapter 21. ASLO THANKS FOR ALL THE REVIEWS! They make me smile, lolol. To CaryMae thank you! :) **

Santana knew something was off the moment the mistake popped into Brittany's head. Something tugged at her heart. She tried so hard to stop, and ask Brittany what was happening, she tried to stop her legs from taking the steps, but no matter how hard she tried they wouldn't. They dragged Santana out of the place. Her hands were wet with sweat, and her brow was furrowed. Her tears were slowly filling her eyes, afraid of what would happen. Every step she took, took her further away from a fragile Brittany, and every step she took almost nearly made her trip. Her hands were shaking at her sides and her feet were aching.

When she got to the super market, she forgot what she was supposed to get. Her fear took over her body. She rushed around the aisles picking anything up by her. She ran through one aisle, and rushed through the other. She ran to the nearest till, and took her purse out of her pocket. She took some money out of it, and handed it to the person serving her. She waited for the receipt and ran outside, not waiting to see if she had change. She grabbed the bags on the trolley and she ran home. Her arms felt like they were going to drop off and her knees felt like they would give up on Santana. Her eyes were spilling tears, and her tears danced on her cheek before finally dropping around Santana's feet. The tears fell with loud thuds that even Brittany could sense. Santana wasn't sure what she was running from, or running to. Not yet.

She reached her hands out to push at the door. With a yank it opened. It revealed an empty hallway, and the smell of Brittany. There wasn't any noise coming from any rooms. Santana dropped the bags at her sides, and closed the door. Something tugged too hard on her heart and her heart sunk. Santana desperately wished for even the slightest noise of breath or muffled cries anywhere, but the only thing she heard was her own voice.

"Brittany?" She said it calmly, but her voice was faltering. She knew now. "Britt, no please..." The only cry she heard was her own. "Brittany..." Santana fell to her knees. The only breath she heard was her own. She started to cry and her hands flung to her face to cover up the mess. She gasped for air, she hadn't even checked the whole house, but she knew, she already knew. Her hands flew to her hair, and she tugged at them. She was angry and she was guilty. She was broken and she was tore. Just like Brittany. Santana got to her feet gulping down at the lump that formed in her throat. She stepped inside the living room, and on the couch, she saw sheets of paper. On top was Brittany's phone.

Santana fell to the ground, she felt her heart break into a million pieces, she felt her hands clench at her sides, and she felt her eyes cry out an ocean of tears. Her cries weren't loud, or angry, her cries were broken. Every single part of her body was as good as broken. She had built up this wall around her and Brittany to protect the both of them, it hadn't always worked, but now it was broken. It was broken from the inside. The years and years of struggle she faced, she now had to face alone. The big step she took to accept her feelings for Brittany now didn't matter because she was gone. Santana didn't blame herself, Santana didn't blame Brittany, she blamed Brittany's parents. She blamed the people who had driven her away. She couldn't feel a thing, her whole body was numb, but in an achy way. Her head dropped and she noticed her cries had made her lap soaked. She tried to wipe it away, she tried to wipe away her feelings but it wouldn't work. She stopped and got agitated. She scratched her legs and clenched her knuckles on her laps. She grabbed her head and trapped it between her knees, while whispering 'stupid, stupid, stupid' again and again to herself.

She finally stood up; the tears were still strolling down her face. She grabbed the phone and brought it to her chest. She held it tightly and she closed her eyes. She took a few steady breaths until the tears settled in the corners of her eyes. She opened them carefully preventing them from falling. She was pushing the phone into her chest, like it would help. Like it was the missing part of her heart. She knew full well the missing part of her heart belonged with Brittany. She thought for a moment, she thought she could go and try look for Brittany. But she knew it was too late. She settled with the last thing she could think of and she took the sheets of paper on the couch. She opened the folded pieces and started to read.

**Wahhh! This was hard, reviews please.**


	22. Chapter 22

**We're nearing the end of this story, so, I'm going to start the sequel soon, look out for it! (Started writing this chapter in London, just FYI.)**

[Santana's pov.]

I took the crumbled pieces of paper into my scrawny hands. I took a deep breath. I carefully opened the paper, I was afraid of breaking the few things I had left of Brittany. My hands were shaking, and my body was quavering. I looked at the letter without reading any of the words; I wanted to savour everything and anything I could. Her handwriting was different. The only thing I could read without reading the words were Brittany's emotions through writing. I could tell she was scared, and unsure by the way some of her letters were a little shaky. I could see spots of paper that had been cried on. Brittany's tears soaked into them and dried. My eyes started to fill with tears. They gathered around my eyes waiting to trail down my cheeks. I needed her, I needed her to catch my tears, and I needed to feel her soft touch on my cheeks. I wanted to hear her voice assuring me that it was all going to be okay. I needed her and I couldn't have her. What hurt the most was the uncertainty whether or not she would come back, whether or not she would come running back into my arms.

I interrupted my own thoughts, and got on with the matter at hand. I squeezed my eyes shut and blocked everything out; I clenched my chest to numb down my feelings. I opened my eyes and I read.

_My dearest Santana,_

_Please don't be mad, I know I am making a mistake and I know you can probably guess every single word on this letter, I'm sorry. I couldn't take it, everything I did, everything I inhaled and everything I saw triggered a train of thoughts and feelings that I could no longer forget. It was too hard, and you know me, I run away. It's the only thing I know how to do, I know I haven't got the right to ask you to forgive me, but I'm sorry. It was hard to see you so broken and upset, it was hard to hear your voice quaver, and it was hard to know that you are so bloody miserable because of me. I know that you're going to hold on to me for as long as you live, but I'll tell you now you deserve so much more. I'm a tragedy, I'm a fuck up and you sure as hell deserve so much more. I love you Santana, don't ever forget that, and don't ever doubt it. _

_You know, I remember everything that has ever happened between us. I remember the first time we met, and the first time you kissed me. I remember when you made up that stupid lie that you tripped and your tongue accidentally slipped into my mouth. You are precious Santana, and I wish I could spend the rest of my life with you, but I feel like I am forcing you to be with me, like you don't have a choice, please Santana you have to do what you want, you don't have to keep pleasing everyone around you. You need to be yourself because when you are, that's when you're at your best. You have to stop being so secretive, you have to open up your heart to other people than just me, because I'm an idiot Santana, I always end up hurting the ones I love most, and I don't know how to prevent it other than to run. You will be okay S._

_I know this is a mistake, and I know this will take me 100 steps back from happiness, but I can't fight a prophecy. I want to run away with you, but I can't ask you to do that, you have your whole life ahead of you. I am so sorry, and I love you, I love you like it was written in the stars, and I'll never stop loving you. I'm so sorry Santana, please don't be mad. I wish we could have gone public earlier, but I wouldn't change a thing between the two of us. I am not going to forget you, but I hurt you and I should be sent to the deepest depth of hell. _

_I left my phone here so you can't talk me out of it, because I know and you know that even just the sound of your voice will send me back into your arms, and I can't have you throw your life away just for me. I will text you when I get to my aunties, don't go there because I won't stay there. Once again Santana, no words can explain how sorry I truly am, and no words can explain just how much I love you. Oh and by the way I took a picture of you and me from your shelf, please don't be mad._

_You and me against the world, Santana. 2 helpless girls, in love and broken. I'm sorry. I love you, don't forget me._

_Brittany._

I felt my throat close up at every single word she wrote. I could hear my gasps frantically turn into sobs, and I could feel my heart sink into somewhere that only one girl could fine. I dropped the paper on the floor and tugged at my hair. I let my tears fall on my cheek and I let it slice my face into hundreds of pieces. I let the tears fall around me, I let the thudding noise of my heart disappear and I let myself loose in my own mind. I let myself break apart, I let myself feel so alone and useless. I let myself feel so helpless and stupid. I couldn't think straight, I needed to get away, just like Brittany had, but I couldn't. I couldn't do that; I needed to wait, even for the rest of my life, for Brittany to come back. My hands flung to my face. I cursed into the palms of my hands. I was angry at myself for letting her slip away so easily. I was angry at myself for not accepting my feelings sooner. I was angry and no one was there to catch my every word. No one would stop me because the only person that cared was Brittany, and she was gone. Gone. She ran away, she ran away without me, and I don't know what hurt most.

I picked the paper up and I reread it every time I reached the end, I reread every single word, and I held onto it. I forced it into my mind so I wouldn't forget, so I wouldn't forget this hurt. The feeling of being heartbroken. It was to remind me every single day that it was my fault, and I drove her away. It was me, and I was an idiot. It was the only way I could prove that what we had was real, and it wasn't all in my head. After the 5th time of reading it, everything was unbearable. I could imagine Brittany in my head, crying, and it hurt to see her like that. I could hear her voice quaver and I wanted to hold her in my hands, and never let go I wanted to fix it all because it was all my fault.

It wouldn't end, I couldn't stop hearing her voice and I couldn't stop seeing her behind my lids. It was unbearable and it was driving me crazy.

**When I first thought of having Brittany write a letter I had tons of ideas of what to write about but I forgot most of them so, this is a bit suck-y. I think I will have 1 chapter left to this story. READ: When I post the last chapter to this, I'll also post the first chapter to the first sequel I'm doing, so you guys won't have to wait long. Well anyway, can I have a lot of reviews please?**


	23. Chapter 23

**Okay, I know I said that this is the last chapter, but no I think I'm going to write 1 or 2 more, I don't know, don't trust me ok? Oh by the way I started writing my first sequel today, I've written the first 3 chapters! Anyway, I want some feedback.**

[Santana's pov]

She found me on the floor crying my soul out. She didn't have to ask what was happening because it was obvious, and anyway Santana Lopez does not cry in front of anyone but Brittany, not even my parents. She could hear my burning voice that left a sting in her ear. She dropped whatever she was carrying and she walked over to me. She wasn't sure what to do, because she had never been in this position before and she didn't know how I felt. She hadn't fallen in love with anyone so much that gave her even the slightest advantage to use with me. My cries and sobbing covered for the awkward silence that should have fallen between us.

"Oh honey." She started, though she knew no words that came from her mouth would calm me down. She sat down on the floor next to me, and reached out for my face. Her touch burnt my face, and her gaze burnt holes through my skull. Me and my mum never had a strong relationship, and I could tell she was really trying, because she didn't want to be here. She didn't want to be comforting me. In fact, the only reason she hadn't kicked off about me and Brittany is because Brittany was the only one there for me. She thought Brittany would never leave me, Brittany was a safe option and she trusted her with me, she trusted Brittany to always pick up the pieces so she didn't have to do it. She was afraid and now that Brittany had gone, things would be different. Nonetheless she had no choice, so she stayed there with me dreading every single second. Honestly, I didn't mind that my mother didn't love me, even if she was my mother. I didn't mind because I was forced onto her and I was a tragedy. I'm a shame, I'm a nobody. She was forced to love me because its how it worked, you give birth, and if you fall in love with the baby, you do, but if you don't, you don't. I was thankful she didn't give me away to be looked after some stranger. She was forced to love me but she didn't. I was forced to love her because she was my mother, and unfortunately for me I did. She brushed my hair out my face, and made eye contact. I couldn't return the favour, because it would just send me down into some world of depression. She let me go; she was giving up on me. I shuddered at the absence of her burning touch. I stopped crying, I held it in, each second I did, the lump in my throat was forced bigger, and the tears in my eyes were reaching their highest levels. My mother looked at me waiting for some answers. I opened my mouth hoping no wails would come out.

"She, she ran away mum. She's gone t-to her aunties, and, and she told me she loved me, but she's run away mum, I can't do this, I can't do anything without her, mum please I need her. I want her here, I need her and tell me she needs me too, please mum. She's gone. She's really gone." I let the tears fall on my cheek and I clenched my jaw shut.

"It's okay Santana. Brittany will be back, If not soon, then later. You'll find each other." My mother's words were forced, they sounded so fake and unreal, and this only made me sob uncontrollably harder. I could hear my voice disappear, I could feel the scraping sensation each note I let out make. I could feel all the energy I had seep away from every single part of my body, and I could feel my love for Brittany grow. I could feel my heart thud with anger and sadness. I could feel my tears crash around me destroying anything and everything on its path. I clenched my hands into fists until I could feel them slowly hurt.

My mother held me there for the night; I fell asleep on her lap. She cradled me like a baby, and pretended that she loved me. She held me there for the night occasionally grazing my cheek, and whispering words that she didn't really mean. She held me there in her arms, pretending to care. And then she leant her head down, hesitating a little, and pecked me on my cheek. Everything was irrelevant and nothing made sense, my mother who had never cared had just kissed me? My soul mate had left me? I was crying? I was crying in front of my mother? The once caring parents Brittany had were in jail? Nothing was right in the world because Brittany wasn't here, and it was partly my fault for loving her too much.

**Feedback please! Also, I won't be updating until I get at least a satisfying amount of reviews on this chapter. (Lol, sorry, I just like reviews, a few more chapters left okay?)**


	24. Chapter 24

**Guys, I need opinions I think I am going to extend 'Helpless'! Good or bad news? BUT I will still be posting my sequel, as soon as this story goes into 'future' mode? Or should I write the 'future' bit of this story into the second sequel I'm doing?**

[Santana's pov (I'm having too much fun with point of views!)]

As the sun rose, I stirred. I was alone in the middle of the floor, physically and emotionally. The room was empty, I was empty. Then it shook me, I could go, I could go to her aunties and beg for her. I didn't care how desperate I sounded because I was desperate; I wasn't going let her get away so easily. No, I am Santana Lopez and she is Brittany Pierce.

I wasn't sure what to do, I wasn't sure if Brittany would still be there. Then it hit me, Brittany hadn't texted me...

Brittany promised and Brittany always kept her promise. What if she was lost? I felt my gut clench at my thoughts. I jumped up to my feet and fumbled on the floor, looking for any phone I could grab. I checked mine, no new messages or calls. I checked Brittany's phone, 1 new text message. My heart did a somersault. I quickly opened the message clumsily. It was sent 20 minutes ago.

_I'm here, I'm so sorry. I love you so much San._

My fingers automatically clenched around the mobile, but I let go straight away letting it fall to the ground, because I could have broken it, and I wasn't going to lose anymore things. I ran up the stairs not caring about who was asleep, my guesses were that my mother had left in the morning. I ran to my room, and Brittany's smell hit my face. It made me teary eyed, and it made my heart sink, but I didn't have time to cry, so I grabbed the first clean article of clothes I could get my hands on and ran to the bathroom, I took the quickest shower of my life, brushed my teeth, got changed and ran down the stairs. I looked for my keys and the second I found them, I rushed out the door, I took the letter Brittany had written for me and the phone she had left behind and placed it on the left side of my car. Then I flung inside and started the engine. I drove like a maniac, and I was pretty sure if the cops had been around, they would have stopped me, but there weren't any. Thank God as well, because I wouldn't have stopped. This was probably one of the biggest decisions I have made, and I wasn't going to let some measly old cop, stop me for even a second to warn me about shit. I drove to Brittany's aunt's house, and as soon as I got there, I started to doubt what I was doing. Maybe she didn't want to be with me? But then I realized that was silly because we were Brittany and Santana.

I got out of the car and I flung myself at their front door, I banged at their door impatiently. My heart twisted into knots as someone opened the door. It was her aunt.

"Santana! Hey, I haven't seen you in a long ti- Oh." Realization settled on Brittany's aunt's face. I scrunched my face up, I couldn't contain the tears anymore, I could smell Brittany's fragrance from her house, and it was fresh. My tears flung out of my eyes and dropped to the floor. She held her hands out for me; with no options left I collapsed on to her. I was useless. Helpless even, I couldn't do anything, I couldn't breathe, and I was a tragedy. I was a tragedy without Brittany. How could I have let myself fall for someone so much?

"W-where is she? I need to see her please Jenna!" The words blurted out from my mouth before I could get myself together. I shuddered my tears away, and gasped uncontrollably. She just looked at me, with an empty expression, I read her face and I could tell Brittany had just left, I had just missed her, I flung out of her warm embrace instantly missing the warmness of her touch. I ran to the side of the house trying to see if Brittany was still in sight. There wasn't no-one there, there wasn't no vehicles in sight. I fell on the ground unintentionally, and my eyes were leaking again. I was on someone's lawn, crying my eyes out. How had I let myself become so... open? Out of the corner of my eyes I could see Jenna. She was approaching me; she was wearing a pained expression on her face. She looked like she was about to cry. She reached for me, and I couldn't flinch away. I didn't want her touch, I only wanted Brittany's. I stood up, and she dragged me into the warmth of her house. Brittany's fragrance was still very much strong and I inhaled it, savouring every second. I knew I wouldn't be this close to her in a very long time, and it hurt me to think she wasn't coming back running into my arms. I wanted her to love me. We sat in her living room for a few minutes; she waited until I could calm down a little before she stood up to get me a drink. She came back clutching a cup of cold water in her hands. She offered me it, and I took it. I drunk so much, I expected it to come back out through my ears and nose. I put the cup down on the floor. She looked at me, I looked back at her. Her gaze was burning a hole through my glistening eyes.

"Oh Santana." She broke the silence. She reached her hand out to lightly place her hand on my knee. I gasped at the unwanted sensation. She sent a thrill of comfort and surprise through my body. She sensed my actions but kept her hand firmly in place. I stared at it and she finally took it back to her own lap. "Brittany, she loves you, she said," She paused. "She needed to leave, she needed you to understand." I didn't say anything. I kept my focus on my knees. "She's in a really bad state Santana, even maybe worse than you." I looked up at her, anger in my eyes.

"Then why did you let her go off into god knows where alone?" My voice slightly rose. It was unintentional spite but it had already come out my mouth and there was no taking it back. "Jenna this is Brittany we're talking about! She knows she's making a mistake but she won't learn from it until it's already too late. Brittany is intelligent, I don't doubt that for a second but she needs me Jenna, she needs me to get through every day! Don't you understand? She needs me, just as much as I need her." I looked at her eyes, searching for answers.

"Santana, Brittany needs to do this; she's reminded every day of what happened in Lima!" She stopped. Her voice rose. "For goodness sake Santana! This is for the best, you don't know how Brittany feels, and neither do I! Her own motherfucking flesh and blood was nearly beating her to death! How much more of reality can you take? Her sister was taken, and she's 100% sure she's never going to see her again!" I averted my gaze; her words stabbed my heart a million times. She calmed down. "She loves you so much Santana. I see the way she looks at you, the way she talks about you. She's in a bad way, but don't you ever doubt for a second that she doesn't love you. She'll come back to you when she's ready. For the meantime, don't disappoint her; don't dwell on the past, because she will come back in the future, and don't you dare stop loving her. I for one will be helping you prepare for when she comes back. Right, I may not be some physical therapist, but I know as much as you know that your parents can't deal with this. Now, Sally has left me, and I'm still in my grieving process, but I will help you. You can stay with me, regarding you want to, and your parents are fine with it." It took me by surprise. Why was she being so nice to me? She hardly knew me. I looked at her face studying her emotions, I was half expecting a laugh to escape from her lips and yell 'kidding' or something similar, but she was serious. Someone actually cared for me. I didn't know what to say. I opened my mouth hoping something would come out. Nothing did, so I closed it.

"I... don't know, thanks Jenna... I'll uh sleep on it. I'm sorry to have sprung myself on you like this." I was mentally beating myself up; I was cringing at the pain. "I should go." And with that I ran out of her house, clutching my face like it was going to fall off.

**Only 3 reviews? :( Ok, I had so much fun writing that, but I kind of added some things I hadn't thought about before, so I guess there'll be more chapters coming to this! Now I have to rewrite my first chapter on the sequel because of the added things, well I hope you enjoy this as much as I had fun writing it, I would like some feedback though. Do you want Santana to stay with Jenna or? Also, I think I am going to dedicate my last few, or just my last chapter to the best reviewer ok? :) **


	25. Chapter 25

**For** **Sftblgleek29, because you're totally awesome! :)**

**So I've decided to do most of the future bit in this story, because it would be much easier. But the second sequel is the future, future. Also, I won't be posting the first sequel anytime soon, I think. I think I am going to call it 'A Dancers Regrets'? Yes or no? Do you have better name ideas?**

(Santana's pov (I think the rest of the story is going to be in Santana's pov, but I'll put this at the top every chapter just in case anyone forgets.)]

I drove home in silence, not daring to let a tear fall out. My heart heaved in my chest; I expected it to pop out of my chest. I was nervous, but why? I knew perfectly well that if I stayed with her it would be for the best, but I would stay there for the wrong reasons. I was sure my parents wouldn't let me go live with someone they don't even know. I was sure I wanted to stay with Jenna, and I was sure the decision would lead somewhere good and bad. As I came closer to my house, my palms started to sweat. I was mentally picturing scenes of how they would react. I wanted to stay with Jenna, one because she was the closest link to Brittany, two, I wanted to get away from my parents, and three it was for the best.

I stepped out of my car feeling the world beneath me. I took shaky steps to my door, I opened it and there they were, standing in front of the doorway looking at me. What had I done? Nothing. Of course not, they knew something was up because I just went a-wall. _What the fuck do I do?_ I was panicking in my mind; I didn't know how to bring up a conversation that could break my parents. So I just stood there, the awkward silence slowly forming between us. I looked at them just below their eyes; I couldn't give them eye contact: I felt guilty. I felt like an idiot. We stood there just staring for what seemed like a century.

"Well Santana, are you going to tell us or are you going to stare at our cheeks until we die?" The words travelled from her mouth into my ears, stinging every part of my body. I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. "Well?"

"I don't know where to start." It was too honest. I waited for a snipe comment.

"Well how about starting with where the fuck were you?" My mother eyed me up and down, looking for answers. I gave her none. "Santana!"

"I was with, with Brittany's aunt." I looked at the floor beneath me, they felt like they would make a hole around me and I would fall around the pits of hell. I chewed on the insides of my cheek. I needed time to get my words together.

"Why were you there?" A deeper voice asked me.

"... Brittany, she, she was there, I wanted to see her, but I-I was too late." I kept my eyes trained on the ground.

"Santana, you have to get over Brittany, you didn't love her. That's silly, two people of the same sex, they don't fall in love! It's all fantasy." Her words sent sharp pains down my back. My anger was reaching a new found level.

"Well, I guess I'm a fucking fantasy, how dare you tell me I am not in love with someone I obviously am? I might as well be a fucking unicorn who lives in a fairy castle." My insults were dry. They didn't make sense, but that was all I could muster up. All of this, they were changing me; they were taking down the walls I had built, slowly targeting each one. They gave me dry looks, to match my dry comments.

"What? Are you trying to say that you're some lesbian? I didn't bring you up to be a lesbian, so get this silly idea out of your head, or, or" She paused wondering if she was doing the right thing, I knew what she was going to say next, and I gave her my eye contact, as if challenging her. "Or, I chuck you out of this house."

She had the nerve; her words stung me more than I thought it would have. It hit every nerve in my body, but this was what I wanted right?

"No mum, how you are brought up does not determine your sexuality." I ignored her threat.

"So, I guess you wouldn't mind living out on the streets then? Because I am not having your silly presence in my house." She was calm. I was calm. What was up with the world?

"I've had enough mum, how dare you? I can't help who I fall in love with! It isn't a choice because really, If I had a choice, I would be up in some mans grill, you think this is easy for me? You think it was my decision to fall in love with a girl?" My words left a horrible taste in my mouth. I couldn't give any insults. I was defeated and I took getting chucked out as my reward. I dropped my head, and ran up the stairs. I walked into my room, and grabbed everything I could; I shoved them into 3 massive bags, and walked down the stairs. Each step I took nearly sent me down the stairs on my head. They were on the same place, they were unable to move. They watched me struggle.

"Fine Santana, live out on the streets. Have a nice fucking life." My dad's voice was harsh. He laughed. I winced at the words he threw at me.

"Where do you plan on going? How do you plan on feeding yourself? You'll die." My mother said the last two words like she wanted me to die.

"What do you fucking care?" It came out of my mouth before I could stop. She approached me and slapped my face. I didn't care. I had money; I had been saving up my whole life, in case something like this happened. I always knew I was destined to be chucked out of my house. I stepped outside; my tears were settled on my eyes. I wasn't going to let them out and make them make me look weak. My parents hated me, I knew that much, but I couldn't help it. I turned around and looked at them in the face; they looked like they were enjoying it. I still loved them.

"Bye mum, bye dad. I'm sorry I was a disappointment." I let that hang in the air, and sting them. I wasn't sure if it worked, but I meant every word.

I got into my car, and drove back to Jenna's house clutching Brittany's phone in my hand whispering useless words, nobody listened to. But I knew this was the bad part, so where was the good part?

**Okay, thank you guys, please review.**


	26. Chapter 26

**Reviewers where have you gone? I think I am about to cry :'( you guys owe me, so I need loads of reviews on this chapter okay? Did you not like last chapter or what? :(**

[Santana's pov.]

I stepped out of my car, wobbling on my feet. My tears had magically stayed in the corners of my eyes. I wasn't sure what I was doing, was it right to just dump myself on this person? Before I could think more about it and drive away to live out in the streets, I banged on her door. I was so angry, and I needed to transfer my energy to something, and that something was banging on the door. I felt guilty, but I couldn't process anything but sadness around my body. She opened the door, she wore an annoyed look, but it quickly softened as she saw my pained face. She held her arms out, and I gave in. It was an instinct; it was what Brittany normally does. I held onto her tight, wishing and wishing that she was Brittany, but no matter how hard I wished or held onto her, she wasn't Brittany, and she never would be. So I cried, I let my tears soak her clothes, and I let myself go. _Fuck everything. _What was life without Brittany anyway?

* * *

><p>I was inside, sitting on Jenna's couch. She was sitting on the couch opposite me. I gave her eye contact. How did I stop crying so fast? How did I get inside so quick? I lifted my hand to touch my face, to find my tears sitting there, but they weren't there.<p>

"W-what," I stopped, my throat hurt like hell.

"Santana it's been two hours since you turned up at my door step, I think it's time to tell me what just happened." She arched an eyebrow. Two hours? Really?

"What? It hasn't been two hours?" My voice was creaking, and my throat was burning. Every note I let out scraped the sides of my throat.

"What are you talking about Santana? Tell me what happened!" She sounded annoyed. I wasn't sure what she was on about so I recalled the past few hours... or at least the past few hours that I could remember. _Oh._

"I-I came home, and they were just there, they were staring at me" I gave her an empty look. "So I stared back, but I couldn't give them eye contact, because, because I felt guilty... I didn't know how they knew something was up, but they did any-anyway. Then my mother spoke up. She said," I held my breath, knowing this would sting. ""Well Santana, are you going to tell us or are you going to stare at our cheeks until we die?" I, I felt terrible, and I wasn't sure what to say. So I said nothing, but then she prompted for my answer, and I gave her one. It was too honest, too honest for my liking. I said I didn't know where to start." I closed my eyes, picturing it all. "Then she asked me where I just was, then I remember her eyes, she looked me up and down, and again I gave her no answers. So she prompted for one, and I gave her another answer. I, I said I was with you: Brittany's aunt. And I remember how much saying _her _name out loud hurt... It was like, like I was unworthy of saying her name. I remember looking at the floor, and wishing that I would fall around the pits of hell. Then my dad asked why, and I told him the truth." I looked up to meet Jenna's eyes. "My, my mother, she said that it was a fantasy." I looked at her, searching her face. She didn't understand. "She said, she said, that I needed to get over her, that, that it wasn't real. Nothing between me and her was real. She said that two people of the same sex were incapable of falling in love with each other." My throat swelled up. "She said it was a fantasy. She, she said it was a lie Jenna! She said it wasn't true! I remember how bad it hurt, I was waiting for some condolences or something similar, but I got none so I continued. "Then I was angry. Real angry. How could she say that Jenna? She's my mother... I don't understand. Then, then" I gasped for air. "She called me, a lesbian. Then she told me to get the silly idea out of my head because she didn't _bring _me up to be a _lesbian_ or she would chuck me out of the house. Her words... they stung more than I thought they would. I ignored her threat, and I told her that how you are brought up doesn't determine someone's sexuality. Then she said all this stuff about me living on the streets." I clenched my eyes shut, trying to block out my feelings. I wanted to stop sharing everything, but I couldn't, because I had already started. "And then I lost it, I told her how I felt about my sexuality. I remember running up the stairs, and grabbing all my stuff, and walking down the stairs. I remember each step I took, nearly had me fall on my head. Then my dad said, "Fine Santana, live out on the streets. Have a nice fucking life." And it really hurt Jenna. This is my father we're talking about!" I took my hands and hid my face from Jenna. "And then my mother, she basically said I would be better off dead... and I am, I am better off dead, it hurt so much, because it was so true... I walked out of my house, and I took one _last_ long look at them, then I said "Bye mum, bye dad. I'm sorry I was a disappointment." I let it hang in the air, and sting them because I really meant every single word. Then I turned up here... and I don't know what to do Jenna. Please help me, I, I really don't know what to do." I took my hands back to my lap and looked straight at her. My tears started to leak from my eyes, spoiling my vision. I could hardly see Jenna.

"I don't know what to say Santana." She was confident with her words. She shuffled a little on the couch she was sitting on before getting up to sit next to me. She held her arms out for me to fall into once again, but I refused, instead I didn't move. So she made the move, she hugged me. It was awkward, and it hurt. It hurt that she wasn't Brittany. I shrugged her touch away and instantly felt guilty.

"I-I'm sorry Jenna. I-I just-"

"No. Just go upstairs Santana, I'll see you tomorrow. I'll get all of your things from your car, so leave your car keys down here." She was calm, she didn't sound angry or upset. So I got up, and placed my key on the table, then I stopped just before I reached the staircase. I dropped my head, and looked at the floor beneath me.

"Thank you so much Jenna." I whispered, and then I walked up the stairs, into the guest room, and hid under the duvet.

**Again, let me just stress how hard this was to write, and that you guys owe me a lot of reviews! :(**


	27. Chapter 27

**Aw guys, I know you miss Brittany, I miss Brittany too! But if Brittany comes back wouldn't it be tedious and a little boring? Well, here's Brittany anyway.**

[Santana's pov.]

_Her eyes were making a hole through every single part of my body and I could feel it. My eyes shot open and frantically searched for her around the room. I wasn't in Jenna's guest room; I wasn't even back in my room. Instead I was in Brittany's room. I could smell her, I felt like an animal tracking for its dinner, but instead I was tracking my lover. My eyes couldn't seem to roam through one of the corners, no matter how hard I tried. So I closed my eyes for a brief moment, and shot them open. There she was, her blue eyes glistening in the dark. She wore an empty look on her face, she looked empty and alone. I wasn't sure if it was the shadows, but she looked like she hadn't eaten for days._

_Then I felt weird... I felt happy, and sad. I felt angry and excited. I wanted to get up, and hug her tight and never let go. I wanted to tell her never to leave again. But something was stopping me, I felt like someone held a gun to my head. I couldn't move: I couldn't bear to see a miserable Brittany. So instead, I stayed there frozen, staring into her empty blue eyes. _

_Glitch_

_She was by my side. Her hands on each side of my shoulders. I couldn't feel her touch. She felt cold. She felt frail. "Santana, Santana, Santana," She kept repeating my name under her breath, in a voice that didn't belong to her. I closed my eyes, to try and figure out what was going on._

* * *

><p>Then I shot them open. It wasn't dark, I wasn't in my room and Brittany wasn't by my side. Jenna was there, she was shaking me. The voice I could hear definitely wasn't Brittany's, it was Jenna's. I awoke, and I wish I hadn't. Jenna let go off my shoulders, and trailed her hands on my cheeks, where my tears were falling. I was crying in my sleep? Was that even possible? I stopped the tears in their tracks and sat up. I faced Jenna, and I gave her an empty look like Brittany had given me... in my dream.<p>

"Are you okay Santana? I wasn't spying on you; I was just making sure you didn't do a runner on me, and you were crying? In your sleep?" She waited for a response, but I didn't give her one. "...So, I thought I would wake you..."

My eyes searched the room, hoping Brittany would be in one of the corners, but she wasn't there. So instead, I forced a gritted smile for Jenna. "Uh okay, thanks Jenna... I uh want to take a shower..."

"Sure... eh, I put all your clothes in there." She pointed to the massive closet on one of the corners of the room. "I hope you feel better kiddo." She left the room. I didn't feel better, of course I didn't.

"I do." I lied.

* * *

><p>I stepped in the shower, clenching my hands around my sides. I turned it on, and let the water wash failure off my skin. I turned the temperature up. I wanted it to burn off the germs and the trails of tears away from my body. I let every single drop, burn my skin. I let every single drop, clean away my body. Then my legs gave away, and I sat down. I reached up to change the temperature once again, but this time I made it cool.<p>

My hands flung to my face automatically. Though the droplets of water were hiding my tears, nothing was hiding my feelings. So I had to do it myself. I let my face scrunch, on the palms of my hands. My mouth couldn't stop repeating her name, and each time I did, it left a horrible taste in my mouth.

Glitch

I was downstairs, a plate of pancakes and fruit on my plate. There were two strawberries and bananas. I rearranged them to make a smiley face, just like I always used to for Brittany.

Then as soon as I had finished, my head spun. My vision went funny and I felt numb. I grabbed my head in an attempt to stop the spinning, but it didn't work. Of course not. I felt sick. My hands then flung to my stomach to try and heal the ache, but it didn't work. Cold hands then flung onto my shoulders, they were Jenna's hands.

"You alright kiddo?" My head stopped spinning and my stomach stopped aching. I looked down at my hands, and realised I was clinging on to Brittany's phone. The one she had left me. It was strange. It was like it had given me strength. Then I forced a smile, and it was easier than I thought.

"Yeah, uh my head just- nothing. Never mind."

"You sure? I can't help you if you don't talk to me..." She took her hands back. "I want you to tell me everything, how you feel and stuff. Everyday we'll talk okay, and I'll help you as much as I can. I know you feel Santana."

"...How?" It was a whisper that escaped my lips. She gulped.

"Sally." She whispered. "Do you remember? I told you, she left me. She was my one and only. A bit like, the Brittany to my Santana. One day, she just, she left. Couldn't get any simpler than that... I don't know what happened, we were strong. Our relationship was better than ever, but one day, she left me alone, and from then on... I haven't heard from her. I remember dreading every single day." She shook her head, and looked me in the eye. "But you, you Santana, your situation is better than mine, you know why? Because that girl loves you. I know she'll come back one day. I know it." Her words sent my heart far down my body. "Anyway, it's your turn."

I hesitated, I wasn't sure I was ready to tell her what I felt and how I'm going to cope, but I needed to do this.

"...Okay, but only if you tell me how you feel, and uh stuff."

**A few more chapters left, so I would really appreciate it, if you guys reviewed.**


	28. Chapter 28

**I was supposed to write this last night, but I got caught up in things. Why have you stopped reviewing? :( I think I just want to get this story over with so, this will be, probably the second last chapter. I'll try to post the last chapter today, and I plan on also posting the first sequel today. So busy, busy. **

[Santana's pov.]

**5 years later. **

There was a knock on the door, so I went to open the door. In front of me stood someone that looked very familiar. I wasn't sure who it was, and I ended up staring at her weirdly. She had a child in her arms. She was blonde, and she sent my heart around my body. She made me feel awkward, and I knew I was going to hate her.

"Uh... who are you?" Her voice wasn't familiar. I eyed her up and down, still wondering who she was. She had blue eyes. I decided to snipe back.

"I think the question is who are _you_?" I folded my arms across my chest, just for effect.

"Where's Jenna?" She met my gaze.

"No, who are you?" She was now getting on my nerves, and she certainly won't be in my Christmas list.

"Sally. I'm Sally. Who are you?" _Oh. _Sally. She's that _girl_ that broke Jenna's heart. I decided to step outside with her, closing the door behind me. A cold breeze blew and made me shiver.

"What are you doing here?" It was a harsh whisper that slipped out of my mouth. This was none of my business, but I knew something was wrong, and something worse was going to hit, so I felt the need to stick my nose in.

"Excuse me? Where's Jenna?" The baby started to wail in her arms. I could tell the baby was a new born. She pushed pass me and opened the door, and let herself in. I couldn't be bothered to stop her so I let her come inside. I followed her in.

"Jenna?" Her voice sounded different inside. It echoed off the walls and made her sound like she was _home_.

I watched her walk into the living room, where I knew Jenna was. I followed her inside. I saw Jenna on the couch, every muscle tensed. Her eyes were wide open with shock, and her eyes were glistening with tears.

"Sorry J, she just burst inside claiming she was Sally," I saw her wince at the mention of her name. "and, and I didn't know what to do." My hands were cold, so I clenched them at my sides. Jenna looked up at me.

"It's okay S. Uh... give me and, and _Sally _here a few minutes." She said 'Sally' like it was a swear word. I nodded. So I made my way upstairs, wondering why Sally came back after all that time.

[Narrator's pov.]

"What are you doing here?" Sally was fuming. She was angry that Sally came back, just when she was starting to move on. She was annoyed that Sally still had the nerve to show her face after 5 whole years.

"Well, I came to see you!" Sally smiled. Jenna didn't return anything. Sally's smile disappeared. She walked around the living room, like she was inspecting the place. "Oh come on Jenna. You've had that couch for ages!"

"What do you fucking want? After all this time. Do you know how long it's been Sally? Do you?"

"Calm it J."

"No. 5 years Sally, 5 whole fucking years! You left without an explanation, and you come back here strutting your stuff expecting me to fall back into your arms. Which you know I will, because I loved you so much." Jenna started to cry. Sally approached her and was about to offer Jenna a hug when she realised her hands were full. "And, and who's that?"

"This is James." Sally paused, looking a little guilty. "He's my son."

Jenna's heart broke. "So why are you here?"

"For you of course!" Sally looked away.

"I want a fucking explanation Sally."

"Ok fine, I, I was cheating on you with Brandon. Brandon is James' dad. One day he asked me to run away and I did." Sally opened her mouth to say more but she was cut off by Jenna.

"So what the fuck do you want?" Jenna was a mess, she tried to stay calm but she couldn't.

"I want you to come away with me." Sally was obnoxious.

"I don't understand... What about Bradley?"

"Brandon." Sally took a deep breath. "He cheated on me, and I've realised what a mistake I've made. I want you back Jenna. Me and you, we can raise James here together. Please Jenna?"

Jenna was on the fence, she knew she shouldn't be forgiving Sally so quickly but this was the girl she loved, and no matter what she did, and no matter how many times she broke Jenna's heart, Jenna couldn't help but love her.

"So you expect me to run into your arms just because some stupid relationship of yours that ended with you having a baby didn't work out? You expect me to forgive you for leaving me without an explanation? You expect me to run into your arms, because you know that I always will." Jenna was crying hysterically. Jenna's walls were being targeted and being put down. Jenna was forgiving her, every second that passed. "No. I won't run away with you. I can't..."

"Jenna..."

"But you can stay here." It was a rush decision that was made by her heart.

**3 weeks later. **

[Santana's pov.]

"But I don't understand!" My blood was boiling. "Why are you running off with her? She cheated on you and broke your heart Jenna! You can't just up route your whole life just for her! You deserve better Jenna... and, and what about me?" I wanted to scream at her and keep her from going. I needed her, she helped me so much, and now she was just packing. She was packing for Sally. The girl that cheated on her.

"Yes Santana you do." She stopped packing to look me in the eye. "Put yourself in my shoes S. Put Brittany in Sally's shoes. Would you not do the same thing?"

"Yes, I guess I would." It was nothing but a whisper. I gave up, so I stalked off into my room.

So many people have entered and left my life, and the very last person I let in was leaving. I had never felt so alone. Jenna was like my second mother. She did a better job than my mother, that's for sure. I can't face anything alone anymore, I was so used to her, now I have to get used to being alone again.

I hid under the duvet and sobbed into my pillow. My pillow was the next reliable thing I owned. My pillow took in my tears and my sobs every night, and had never once left before. I could sense Jenna walk into my room. She sat at the foot of my bed. She waited for me to stop crying, she waited for me to tell her it was okay. That I was going to be okay. But I wasn't so I didn't tell her. I stayed under the duvet crying and gasping for tears.

"I finished packing." Her voice was shaking. "Santana, stop crying."

I stopped crying, and gasped for air. I sat down on the bed cross legged and looked at the sheet below me.

"I'm sorry Santana. You'll be fine-"

"NO! No Jenna, I won't be fine!" It left my mouth before I could reword it.

"I'm sorry I can't be here to wait for Brittany. I know she'll come. I don't know what to say to you Santana. Sally's like your Brittany. I can't just let her go. My flight leaves in an hour, so I have to go... You can have the house... and everything inside. I'm so sorry." I looked her in the eye. "I love you."

I sprung myself on her. I hugged her tight, never wanting to let go. "I love you too Jenna... I'm sorry, I'm being an idiot, you should go." I didn't let go of her, and she didn't let go of me. "You did a better job than my parents did."

Eventually she let me go, and I was forced to let her go. It didn't feel too bad; it didn't feel like my world was crashing around me. It just felt normal. It felt natural. I watched her stand up and walk out of the door. I watched her walk out of my life carrying bags with her clothes inside.

**This was so hard; I cut a lot of things out, and changed plans halfway through. I'm kind of in a rush, so I don't have time to check this, I apologise for any mistakes, and I hope you guys review. I'm going to write the next and most probably the last chapter now.**


	29. Chapter 29

[Santana's pov.]

**1 year after Jenna left.**

I was at the park. It was Brittany's birthday and I was at the park alone. I went to sit at the bench, where I and she always used to hang out. I felt so empty. There was nobody in my life, and I was so desperate for someone, or Brittany to walk in and light everything up. I stared out in front of me. There was a pond, with ducks that was just a few meters in front of me. I smiled. I smiled when I remembered just how much Brittany loved ducks. I looked up at the sky, the sun was shining, and the sky was blue. It was a nice day. I looked back down, and looked around the park. I was the only one there. Apart from the girl that sat on the bench opposite me. She had dark brown hair with blue highlights, and green eyes. She was slightly tanned and she looked empty, just like me. She was everything Brittany wasn't, yet she was still beautiful. She looked at me, and I realised I had been staring at her. I broke the eye contact and shuddered a little at the loss of it. Out of the corner of my eye I saw her get up. I thought she would go home or something, but instead she started to walk in my direction. She sat beside me, and I looked beside me.

"Hey." Her voice was soft and delicate.

"Hey." I returned.

"You look so sad..."

"...So do you." I looked at the ducks in front of me.

"Ellie." She took her hand out and offered it to me, I gladly shook it.

"Santana."

* * *

><p>It was fast. Too fast. I wasn't into her, and I was pretty sure she wasn't into me.<p>

I lay there next to her in my bed naked. She was gasping for air, and I was ashamed. I waited for her to go, I waited for her to up and leave me, because I knew it wasn't meant to be. I waited for her to magically turn into Brittany, so I can finally stop waiting. I waited, and I waited but no matter how long I waited she wouldn't turn into Brittany. So I lay there, under the covers staring at the ceiling.

"Will you leave?" I didn't mean to sound rude. She got up, and she put on her clothes which were scattered across the floor. I waited until she was fully gone and then I cried.

I cried because it felt so wrong. I cried because no matter how long I waited, she wouldn't turn into Brittany. I cried because waiting is all my life is. My life consists of waiting. Waiting, waiting and waiting, and it hurt.

* * *

><p>"So what does that make us?" I asked, hoping she would say something that wasn't along the line of girlfriends.<p>

"Girlfriends." Her voice rung in my ear, and stung it. I gulped as I squeezed her hand tightly.

**Thank you so much guys for sticking with this story. I know it doesn't seem finished, but that's why I am making another sequel. I posted the first sequel, it's called A Dancers Regrets, and I hope you enjoy it. This chapter was a little rushed because I don't have any time! Give me feedback please, on this and on A Dancers Regrets. Thank you. I'm sorry the last chapter had to be so short, I just don't have time. **


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